Lantana's Latitude

Happy New Year

2011-12-31T19:52:00.000-08:00

Holidays seem to wear a hole in me. But that is no excuse for not posting since August!

Hmm, let's see. I guess Facebook kind of takes the place of blogging. And I do enjoy my Kindle, am having fun dressing it up in bright colors. 'Didn't care for the bleary gray color, too much like the skies here in the Pacific Northwest allll winter! I have a new skin, "Cosmic Flower" and have a new purple jacket coming for it. 'Love the selection of books and short stories that are available for the Kindle. The Bigamist is one of my favorites. And being able to adjust the font size to my liking is a big plus!

Tonight is the last night of 2011. Never did care for odd numbers. I am looking forward to '12, that sounds more to my liking. Passed over the deafie party in Vancouver, as in the past, I avoid having some dirty old man's tongue stuffed down my throat at midnight. In my younger days I hid in the bathroom until it was all over with, but I don't have that much ambition these days, why go to a party to hide in the bathroom? And my night time driving skills are not trustworthy. My depth perception is "off" at night, not to mention my balance to get from the party to my car!

This past week was the birthday of one of my older grand daughters, so 3 grand daughters and one Great and I got together for lunch and to catch up. Little Ellie is so cute and very tough, having 2 older brothers. We went to the Olive Garden, will never go back there again. When I have to pay for a meal, I want something that is cooked right!

My wee backyard is full of different species of birds and a large family of squirrels. The slough is filling up now that it is raining again, and the Great Blue Heron puts in an appearance regularly. 'Had the gardener thin out some "bramble" to make it more attractive back there. Good thing we have 2 Walmarts here, I have to buy alot of bird and squirrel food!

I cooked a pork roast today, a small "loin", which was always my kids' favorite meal growing up. 'Brings back memories, only this time there is some left for me! 'Being alone, I threw in some applesauce and jellied cranberries to make it a meal. Can't forget the pickled asparagus that one of my sons keeps me supplied with. And Leah one of my grand daughers bought me a sack of Cuties!

I am down to two felines, the bottle-fed sisters, or did I mention that before? They are lovely cats and very well behaved except when they go into "play" mode, all the throw rugs go flying across the room! They sleep in my bed, one, Peach sleeps smack dab against my thigh, and Ali kind of moves around, it is almost like they are guarding me! I finally found the flavor of Fancy Feast they like, it is either chicken or turkey with giblets or liver. (Gag!)

All the other old ladies here mostly have dogs, and my backyard faces the walking path, so I do not need a dog, I share the neighbors' dogs. The weather here is too nasty to go out dog-walking, ugh, I would rather retain my hairdo!

Twenty more months and I will be 80 years old! The grandkids are all grown up, the youngest is a sophomore in high school. So far, 6 Greats, one lives in Phoenix so I have never seen him in person, but they keep me supplied with pictures.

So that sums up the latest since August. Happy New Year to my loyal friends out there, I do follow your blogs!

Until next time.

Lantana

Until next time.

Better Late Than Never

2011-08-30T18:42:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile. Moving has it's drawbacks (to put it mildly), but right now, as of this moment, my computers, VP, AND the Blackberry are purring along as they should. I have NO patience with anything that is not perfect! (Wink, wink). 'Enjoyed La Ronda's video post on the new Sorenson's VP. I am sooo happy that SHE is satisfied with it, well, almost satisfied! Like La Ronda mentioned, the old peepers do not do their job as good as they used to, and most everything must be high contrast or it does not work for us "middle aged" peeps. Recently I had my VP hooked up once again via a Sorenson rep (after somewhat of a wait) and it feels good to have it sitting there, ready and willing! However I have never understood why *only* Sorenson people can work on these devices! I have been reduced to tears in the past due to the malfunction of my VP and the lack of personal to work on it. To make matters a little more interesting, almost all of my computer geeks who I hire to work on my computers are eager to learn about the Sorenson VP and are ready, willing and able to learn maintenance! Sorenson has alot of competition these days so I hope that they are studying on HOW to make their devices more user friendly! We deafies can even chat via video on FB now if we so desire and the picture quality is somewhat better than the Sorenson 200! Thanks for listening, folks, see you soon!

OPEN Captions

2011-06-06T17:13:00.000-07:00

I live in Longview, Wa. and the Theatre Pub is in the next town, right across the bridge from Longview, "Kelso, Wa." They have a FB page and are on FB regularly, just go to FB and type in Kelso Theatre Pub and you will be right there with all of the information. The owner is trying for every Monday and Tuesday evening at 6:30. High end films. They also have a restaurant adjoining, but you can eat while watching the movie, all seats have tables in front of them. There is great parking right across the street from the Theatre Pub. Kelso is right off of I-5 a simple jaunt from Portland! Yes, of course we can all wait for the copy to come out to watch at home, but there is more of a social aspect to going to Open Captions, people often like to get together AFTER the movie to chit chat -- you know how it goes! Hope you get there! The pavement is dry now! ~~~~~~~~~~ Next time ~~~~~~~~~~~~

Open Captions

2011-06-04T17:35:00.000-07:00

At my suggestion, the owner of a local Theatre/Pub has begun showing Open Captioned movies on Monday and Tuesday evenings. First rate films, no oldies here! And since it is a pub, you can eat pizza and drink wine or beer while you are watching the movie. I have gone once so far, am going to try for this Tuesday again. Our summer arrived today, finally. Puff puff, I am still getting used to a new house and a new yard and am having problems hooking and unhooking my garden hoses because of arthritis. Lots of flowers in bloom around the complex, everyone here goes all out for a nice looking park-like setting. My Black Eyed Susan plants are getting fat and sassy, all except one. They were planted to cover up the above-ground electrical boxes (which are quite ugly, really!) 'Heading for Astoria tomorrow and their Sunday Market. I really miss that part of living on the Coast, but I am only an hour and a half away and I have a brand new car to take me back and forth! Monday, I will stop at my dealership to ask more questions, as there are quite a few things on my new car that I do not understand! My birds and squirrels are pigs, I have to fill up their feeders every other day! 'Until next time~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Slowly But Surely ..............

2011-05-26T09:56:00.000-07:00

"Backyard" is in, the gate is in place. The side next to the house is hydrangeas and ferns, then a narrow path, along side that are Hebe and some purple flowers that I forget the name of. At the end in a wider space is a Japanese Maple with some Japanesy stuff that I cannot think of the name of at the moment, some kind of moss. It looks nice but need something to separate my path from the barkdust area. It looks messy the way it is now. ~Sigh~. The rain started again and then the slugs came out -- baby slugs, but a slug is a slug! Bought new stuff because I border the walking path and do not want to poison someone's doggie. Right now my handiman is building me a big closet in the double garage for my excesses. It is so big that I told him I was going to rent out the house and move into the closet! This guy aims to please but goes overboard, sometimes I am afraid to look! He is a gem and I am fortunate to have him, sure do wish he would acquire some front teeth, it would be so much easier to read his lips. No one can read a dark hole! Missing teeth is very common here in Longview. Either missing or very bad teeth. Being deaf, of course I notice the mouth and the eyes first! After the closet is completed, I am going to slow down for awhile. All these projects are hard on the nervous system. Until next time.

Bad Karma

2011-04-10T16:28:00.000-07:00

A run of icky luck lately. A local carwash malfunctioned and slammed my front bumper to the tune of $721.00 and some cents. The guys had to repaint the driver's door to get a match. ~Sigh~ and I had to rent a car, being that I live a ways out of town. The proprieter of the carwash refused to acknowledge any responsibility -- figures. 'Found a new zuke recipe in the local papers that sounded wonderful, so I went shopping and bought up what I needed. Guess what? My Cuisinart went belly up! It was old and had alot of miles on it, but we were bosom buddies and I feel sad over the death of an old friend. ' Went shopping and bought a new Kitchen Aid which seems to get the job done okay. I have 4 bags of new dirt and am all ready to plant, just waiting for April 15th, which is my usual jump off date. Am keeping things simple, nothing like I had in Naselle and Seaside, but enough to get my paws dirty. Still do not know what I want to do with my strip of backyard -- my creative juices are not flowing at this time. Emailed the company that did my front yard but have not heard back. Maybe he's had enough of my sass? Could be, but SOME people still need to learn that the customer is always right. ~~Chuckle~~. 'Lots of birds! I have never seen American Goldfinches this early, there were young ones a month ago! They have to be one year old before they turn yellow. Lots of ducks come up out of the slough to feast on the bounty. I am still waiting for my handyman to build me a gate so that I don't have to slide under the fence to feed my critters! Until next time. Lantana in Longview.

Looking For Spring!

2011-04-01T16:10:00.000-07:00

Wow, here I am again as big as life and twice as ugly. Or did I use that line before?!? At my age the memory is starting to fade, but perhaps that is a plus not a minus!?! I have lots of things I need to forget. So here I am in my new over-55 digs. So far so good. Many of my neighbors are still wintering somewhere else, and I do not blame them. I have yet to meet my neighbors to the South, last time I heard, they were in Ireland. I stepped out awhile back and attended the deafie St. Patricks party in Vancouver (yes, Vancouver, WASHINGTON, not BC). It felt strange driving home in the dark, everything looked different and so I was careful not to take any shortcuts or detours. Been there, done that, with scary results. I ran into many, many of my former students and co-workers. I met a new friend who was wearing a green wig, which was helpful in finding my place at the table when I wandered off. Thanks, Elaine! It is always a treat to make a new friend, and a fellow deafie at that. I enjoyed getting out for a change but have to admit that big crowds are no longer for me -- and at night at that. I felt out of my element. I have been keeping my handiman busy and he will get busier as the weather becomes decent. Lots of pruning to do out in back in the "green belt", which I understand I can adjust and modify to my wishes. Lots and lots of birds at my baffled feeders, even early American Goldfinches at the finch feeder, and alot of Red Winged Blackbirds. Interesting that I had a flock of Muscovy Ducks picking around under the feeders. So beautiful and regular residents of the slough out in back. No sign of our resident Blue Heron, I can imagine that he/she is busy this time of year, and who knows how far he had to go to meet up with his permanent mate? Blue Herons mate for life. No appetite! I enjoy shopping for groceries and browsing through all the new tidbits that they are rapidly slamming on the shelves these days, but I don't eat the stuff, so stopped buying. I will stick to my whole wheat crackers and my Laughing Cow. No good restaurants here, Seaside spoiled me. I had my regular route down there where the waiters and waitresses there were quick to serve me my single glass of chardonnay. I made a quick trip to Seaside awhile back to pick up the seatbelt extenders for my new car and I hit the Pig and Pancake for my favorite strawberry crepes before I hurried home. I say "hurry" because I had forgotten that it was Spring Break. I put up with that for too many years while a resident there! Speaking of my new car, a local carwash caused $641.00 worth of damage to my left front fender! This was the second carwash that did damage and this "ding" is a dilly! It will take 2 days to fix and I will have to rent a car, since I live so far out of town. I guess I should have kept mu Subaru, nothing ever happened to that! Until next time. Lantana in Longview.

A New Community (New to Me, Anyway!)

2011-02-24T10:24:00.001-08:00

After living 20 years in the same community, trying to settle down in a new location def has it's trials and errors, particularly for a deaf person. 'Not necessarily MY errors, but I guess I have made a few, I admit!

On the Coast, everyone knew me, or if they didn't actually have the pleasure (hee, hee!), they had heard OF me! I had no problem down there being accepted and a few of the clerks from the supermarket even took brief classes in ASL to be able to accomodate me.

Now, it is a different kettle of fish, I have to start all over again educating folks on deaf culture and what NOT to do when being introduced to a deafie for the first time. My next door neighbor and her husband announced their visit from my front porch by waving their arms and pointing to their ears. :/ Luckily for me I made quick friends with the Association secretary and she spread (my) word rapidly. AND my brand new UltraTec strobe-light doorbell system brought my reputation up quite a few notches. Now the neighbors know that they will not be ignored when they find themselves on my doorstep.

People here were quick to offer "help". I was not and am not sure what they meant by "help", but I assured them that deaf people know how to take out their own garbage cans once a week. ~Sigh~

Nortwesterners tend to hibernate in the winter time, I am keeping my fingers crossed that once we all get outside into the sunshine that there will be many over the fence conversations. Actually my "backyard" faces the community path, so when and if I get lonely, all I need to do is step out in back, where most of the residents happily walk their dogs.

I highly reccomend the new UltraTec *strobe* doorbell system. It is not perfect, due to the many different circuits in these newer homes, but once you accept the device's shortcomings, you will be pleasantly surprised.

We have snow on the ground this morning, lots of birds at the feeder, including very young American Goldfinches at the thistle feeder. My cats, perched on their window seat love watching them. A very calm and relaxing scene!

Until next time. Hugs.

Moooving (ugh)

2011-02-04T13:07:00.000-08:00

Just a brief note this time to let my friends know that I am all moved but still have full cardboard boxes everywhere. I am looking for a person who sells estates, because that is what my stuff amounts to, an estate!

I now reside inland, no more coastal living -- not quite. I bought a condo in a 55 and older gated community which so far is good. The weather has not permitted us all to get outside and become acquainted yet.

I live on a slough with lots and lots of wildlife right in my backyard, including a resident blue heron! Nutria are a problem here, I understand but so far I have seen only one. I understand that the county sprays for mosquitos.

'Set up my new doorbell system which has STROBE LIGHTS so there is no problem missing anyone who comes to visit. The strobes reach where other flashing lights do not. It was a headache to install and is still not perfect, but due to many different circuits in this house, I have to be happy with what I have.

I cannot get back on FB due to my new email addie and the fact that I forgot my old password while I was in the hospital! FB is equal to Nazi Germany!

My kids are coming the weekend of the 12th to set up my new bird feeders out in back. I have only a tiny patch of lawn in back, but across the fence there is a greenbelt for wildlife with so many different species of birds! I had to spend a little $$ and get "squirrel resistent" bird feeders. I understand that there is no such thing as "squirrel proof" just squirrel resistent!

Next post I will explain how my neighbors reacted at having a new deafie neighbor! I have a few complaints, but am trying not to use my soap box at least for awhile!

Until next time,

Missing Landmarks

2010-11-02T16:38:00.000-07:00

Have you ever gone back to your old home town and realized that many of your old landmarks are gone? Do you recall those old, dusty roads (tho we never thought of them as dusty back then) where you walked hand in hand with your latest flame of the moment, walking miles and miles and not realizing it? The neighbors' sheep are lambing and those mean old geese rush out the driveway to make sure you are not an upsetting their routine. Man, those geese bit hard! All of a sudden you start sneezing because a neighbor is bailing hay -- the kind you are allergic to. And our dogs, usually a mixed breed, skipping along beside us because in those days there were no mean Dog Catchers! Now we cannot rush excitedly down to the corner, where the local auction barn smelled of fresh straw and watch the different kinds of animals auctioned off for money, because the "old auction house" is now a Home Depot! And as you kind of turn East to head home you wake up and realize that you have no home, at least not there. The whole field is now a giant housing developement, with cookie cutter houses!

Ahh and have you ever gotten lost in your own home town? The old tavern where you turned left, and the big red barn where you always turrned right are now mini malls!

My grand daughter and I got lost over in Portland the other day trying to find AT&T -- and then a little later trying to find a hospital where I had an appointment. The whole day was frightening -- we became hungry, but which one of those strange looking places served safe food?

Finally after we found the hospital, my grand daughter called her dad and he came and picked her up!

Poor Grandma!

Losing Friends

2010-07-23T22:18:00.000-07:00

I am at that time of life where I have started losing friends, one at a time, but surely and forever. One by one I have had to say, "Goodbye" down deep from my heart because I am not much for funerals or "Memorial Celebrations". ' Let each one of us "celebrate" a person's demise the way we wish, not in a way that suits our culture and is just a convenient way to get together and shoot the bull.

I am doing okay, not a miraculous recovery from losing those close to me, but I am learning to "take it like a man". My pillow is still often wet, but I arise each morning hoping that the new day will be better than the one previous.

I am gaining family, three new great-grandchildren this summer. Two boys and one little girl. The last boy was just born this morning, an emergency because the doctors decided that the placenta was not doing it's job and the baby was nutritionally deprived. Anthony weighed in at 3 pounds and 12 ounces and has been pronounced fit, they got him out in time. Thank the Lord! We just never know what is going to happen next, scary, but surely we just have to plod on.

I will be back very soon. Right now I have two very rambunctious great-grandsons trying to demolish my house in record time. They have a beautiful baby sister, Elliana Marie, and they are beautiful and intelligent and have loving and hard working parents.

Good night to my hundreds of online friends, who often make my life more tolerable.

xoxoxo Patty

LIFE ON AN AXIS

2010-04-14T22:38:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile. And I have been around for awhile. Which means that everything appears more and more discouraging, no matter how you look at it. OBama better not try pulling the plug on ME, because he will have to answer to his own Maker eventually. I am sure he has thought of this, (or should have!) Do we all have the same Maker, no matter our color? I hope so!

Lots of family issues these last few weeks. My daughter's boyfriend retired, only to have a heart attack and have to undergo openheart surgery. My daughter (JanMarie) does not handle stress well, and neither do I, so we are at a stalemate, who is in line for medical importance at the moment? I bow out. I can leave this world at any minute, with no regrets, but feel badly for my children, who still have some years left to enjoy. I guess this is the price we have to pay for having our children young, we all eventually wind up at a dangerous age at the same time. I am not making any sense? 'Thought so! Sorry. I am upset.

JanMarie has worked for the Federal Government for over 30 years (Gifford Pinchot National Forest). 'Hard, physical, contact work, which deals with greatly with common sense instead of something you learn from a book. She worked through the major Mt. St. Helens Eruption and beyond. BUT THEY HAVE NEVER OFFERED HER MEDICAL INSURANCE. Now, at age 57, after 30+ years with Gifford, she is ill with bloodclots in her legs and there is no insurance from the government to assist her or even a good word, or a thankyou, to make her illness easier to bear.

For this I have paid taxes all my life? My adult children are not protected? Not even from an errupting volcano?

I cry in my sleep. I am ashamed for my country. And even now, during my "Golden Years", I have to trust my government to let me live if I become too expensive to them. Still not making sense? I agree with you! Please help me understand!

Alas! Poor Oreck!

2010-03-23T21:43:00.000-07:00

My Oreck vacume cleaner went belly up. Sigh. When I went to check to see if I needed to replace the bag, I had a biiiig surprise waiting for me! The "dock" had broken loose, and the bag was at the very bottom of the outer bag and there was dust and dirt 3 inches thick in there! I quickly zipped up and place this piece of @#$%&%$#@! where I could conveniently place it in my garbage can. My grand daughter was here helping me thru my latest crisis, and she wants an Oreck so badly, so she is going to take it to one of those car washes that have powerful vacume cleaners and try to clean it up and repair it. Was I ever THAT poor? Yep! Been there done that, kind of. 'Developes character, or so they say.

Yesiree, I had my Esophageal Dilatation, and it was simple enough. First off, the taxi that I had made arrangments with, did not show up. I do not DRIVE AT NIGHT, I cannot even WALK at night! (This was 6:00 a.m.). You guessed it, I became confused when I tried to drive my own car and take the shortcut to the hospital. But I made it in time, actually a little early, but found myself teetering to get into the hospital ER where the surgery was to take place. What no doorman??! I made it, but entered with a very bad attitude. Of course the hypo took care of that. Hmm, it would be nice to have those oncall!

The Esophageal Dilatation goes all the way to the stomach and takes pictures of the stomach as well as the esophagus. I have two ulcers. I am not surprised. I am type A ulcer material! They stretched the esophagus, and so far, so good. But I still have a slight, dry cough from my bout with The Crud -- you will recall my story, my sad tale of when I had to forego my grandson's wedding in Phoenix. ~~~~~

Leah came down, so she was here for a few days to make sure I was okay. SHE comes along with the two Greats, two and five year olds, very busy little men! We all survived. She is a gem, leaves the guest quarters in spotless condition, unlike most, who consider my abode a hotel with services accordingly.

The weather has been sunny, not really warm, but the sun feels very good, and with my Southwest exposure, the living room and dining room get pretty uncomfortable. I have not yet learned how to place the screens on my new French Doors, what tricks do I have to perform to get the Windowman to come back and teach me? So far he has ignored my other requests, including re-hanging the garage Venetian blind, which they threw on the floor! I don't give up easily, I will go to the BBB if I have to. I have learned to exert my full "elderly widow" routine almost to perfection -- almost.

So now I am waiting for my Vietnamese neighbors to return this weekend and finish up the paintjob and do a few "handiman" chores around here. These people are unbelievable and I feel so fortunate to have them own a vacation home right next door!

Until next time,

Lantana

No Arizona!

2010-03-18T23:59:00.000-07:00

I NEVER get sick! but guess what, I came down with a humdinger of a respiritory crud and accompanied by a head cold that would have killed a lesser person. Luckily for me, my daughter was already coming to care for my animals anyway, so she was here to (kind of) put up with me while I raged on and on! I am not a good patient, who is?! But 'it' is all gone now, except for a small, dry, hacking cough. (Too many cats??) My daughter has retreated back home where it is safe.

The first night my daughter and her sig other were here, HE had to take me to the ER due to another choking incident. I choked on some deli chicken. This was my 2nd trip to the ER for choking. AND I cannot swallow pills, sooo they have decided to perform an Esophageal Dilation on me this Monday. 'Doctor claims that I will be able to EAT STEAK after this procedure. The doctor also informs me that he performs 3 or 4 of these procedures every Monday on folks my age, and THIS IS A SMALL TOWN! 'Due to the choking, I have almost become a vegetarian, and might more or less lean towards that lifestyle from now on. Who needs all the CRAP there is in meat, chicken, etc. nowdays? I would rather die of natural causes, than chemical causes. Steak no longer sounds so appetizing. :/ Well perhaps the steak that is born and raised on Maui, but that is a long ways away and the Timeshare is sold.

Back to the wedding, I have pictures and it was lovely. Come to find out that the bride is 4 months pregnant, so that means I have THREE GREAT GRANDBABIES ON THE WAY THIS SUMMER! I already have 2 great-grandsons. Pretty soon there will be no more room for ME. But that is fine, I have led an interesting life. I will wait for the big tsunami. I will not need a hairstyle for that one! What a comfort.

Soo on a more positive note, my Vietnamese neighbors are painting the outside of my house WITH A BRUSH. He informs me that this is the only way to go in this area, our customary spray-on "blowjobs" only last 2 years, and at $4,000.00 a pop, they are painful to the pocketbook. These lovely neighbors are also sanding the outside, prepping with a small, handheld sander! This house is two story, high up, facing Southwest, so they have a difficult chore, but they are out there at 8:00 a.m. each morning, while I lie in bed watching the a.m. news! ' Interesting that our painters always sandblasted. So I am getting royal treatment, not to mention an occasional eggroll and some noodles to boot. I will pay them well, they are a lovely couple. He lost an eye during the war, fighting the communists.

Another neighbor, from over on the corner brought me a container of her home-made ministrone soup tonight for my dinner. Wonderful! ' Perfect, just the right amount of everything in it, and just enough meat to satisfy me and not cause me to wind up in the ER, which, by the way are over $4,000.00 per visit. :/ For 3 hours of care. ~~~

Let's see, I have a lead on a new housekeeper. My former gal had to move away, she was on the kidney machine and needed better bus service. Gawd! And I was hiring her to clean for ME! I should have cleaned for HER! www.care.com Punch in your zipcode, they have many things to offer, including nannies and eldercare. 'Very nice website and I have used it before.

That's it for tonight. Tomorrow is another day, if I am lucky!

Until next time. Hugs.

Stormy Oregon Coast

2010-02-10T17:25:00.000-08:00

'No axe to grind. It just occurred to me that I had not written in my blog for awhile. I am at present planning a trip to Phoenix, Az. to attend my grandson, Geoff's wedding. He is a policeman there and his fiance is a school teacher. Their dog, Niner (yeah Geoff is a serious golfer!) will take part in the ceremony.

I live on the rugged Coast and rarely wear anything except jeans and a sweatshirt -- or in warmer weather, a long sleeved T-shirt. So "what not to wear" has been going around and around in my head. (By the way, that is one of my favorite t.v. programs!) Not only that, how am I going to get my clothes there? I do not travel LIGHT and now with this ruckus with the airlines about baggage, I am kind of turned off. For heaven sake, I am going to a WEDDING, I cannot wear the same thing I wore on the plane! And SHOES? However can I stay almost a week without a choice of footwear?!

I spent 16 winters of my life on Maui with my husband, Joe, so yes, I do have Muu Muu's, lots of them! But I am not going to embarass my family by showing up at Geoff's wedding in a tent, and barefoot!

I guess I am going to have to settle the problem by flying Southwest. They do not charge for checking baggage. Free, free, free, BUT they are also more expensive now than the other airlines because they know they can get it!

While I am in Arizona I am going to meet some of my online buddies, and also one of my former students who has remained close to me over the years. She lives in Tucson. And I have been promised shopping trips to beat all shopping trips! I will worry about getting all the loot home later -- UPS, probably.

It looks as though I am going to have to have my left knee done, just as the right one was a few years ago. Hopefully shots will do the trick until school is out and my grand daughters can come down and babysit me. Joe was my nurse with the first operation. Knee replacement surgery is NOT a fun-time, but the results are wonderful. And it will be even more fun when I go thru the scanners at the airport! Clang, clang!

It is getting dark and I have not yet walked two doors down for my mail or my daily newspaper. Too much wind. So I still have my mail and the local rag to look forward to today, and 3 Netflix movies left to watch.

Until next time, friends, I will be back!

Speechless

2010-01-20T21:31:00.000-08:00

My age is no secret, so I am being frank here. I have been with the same medical provider for over 40 years, in fact when I retired from the State of Washington, I was grandfathered in, and was assured by all concerned that I would ALWAYS have this medical plan. When I turned a certain age, this Plan (K) became my secondary provider and Medicare the Primary provider. Okay, fine, all's well, no problem!

I have always longed for a female doctor. When I had my knee replacement and I whined to the surgeon about my lack of bone strengthening medication, the surgeon (not a part of K), told me to GET A WOMAN DOCTOR! K was trying to force me to drive to Portland for a bone density test, but sorry guys and dolls I do NOT DRIVE TO PORTLAND for anyone's benefit, including my own. I would rather be ALIVE with brittle bones than dead in a horrific auto accident! Portland traffic is not for sissies!

Finally (another long story), I fired my male doctor and was given a female and this past week I had an appointment with her. We got along just fine and nothing was mentioned about an ASL Interpreter, or anything in regard to my deafness.

At the end of my appointment, as usual I received the customary computer printout, which is great, particularly for a deaf person who wishes to make sure that all issues were covered and with no misunderstandings.

Guess what? I was again referred to The Oregon Osteoporosis Center -- in Portland. I thought a woman doctor was supposed to be in my camp? (Weeping silently).

And that isn't all. At the end of the printout in bold type (shouting), "Your clinician has requested a referral for Speech Therapy Services. You will receive a referral authorization in the mail."

Why now, after 40+years??

BECAUSE MEDICARE WILL PAY FOR A SPEECH THERAPIST, that's why! K was never interested in improving my speech during the previous 40+ years when it was *their* dime.

Okay, great, FROM NOW ON, I AM GOING TO ASK FOR AN ASL INTERPRETER!

The devil made me do it!

A New Deaf Author

2010-01-10T17:37:00.000-08:00

I would like to make everyone who reads my blog aware of our newest deaf author, Stacy Canter. You can Google her name up, but I have known her for quite a few years as a close online friend and confidente, thus, I thought I would give her a plug here on my blog.

Stacy is deaf and has a CI. She mainly lives in the hearing world, has a hearing husband and children, but never the less, her problems are OUR problems, we deafies stick together.

Part of our close rapport came from the fact that I, a former Student Life Counselor for the deaf, was very aware of the frequency of sexual abuse of deaf children. I saw it too often to deny it existed. It has been only recently that these victims, now adults have come out with their stories and I hope that their opening up and forcing the public (and parents!) to become aware of a sick society that preys not only on a child but a child with a disability! And the saddest part is, the perps were almost always close members of the family, an uncle, a babysitter, etc.

I am not going to spoil Stacy's story by saying too much here, I will let you read her book. I am sorry I cannot say, "Happy Reading" in this case!

You will find her on Facebook under her own name.

Great work, Stacy, we are proud of you!

A New Year, a new profile?

2010-01-04T23:01:00.000-08:00

I made a pact with myself that I would start being more loyal to my blog. 'Looking over my profile here, it almost doesn't sound like me! Something happened, I CHANGED, or got old, or something, perhaps both? Nodding.

I keep in touch with a majority of my former students via Facebook, and I find that I enjoy this a great deal, perhaps because I can get by with short sentences, I do not have to cringe over any writing boo boo's because everyone else makes the same slip ups. On Facebook no one is trying to impress anybody! We hang loose and it does not matter there if you are a Democrat or a Republican because no one cares. On Facebook everyone laughs at themselves!

As a widow I am doing okay. I have 2 more great-grandchildren on the way, no, not twins, from two different grandchildren. At 30 years old, my oldest grandson is finally having his first child, and my grand daughter, Leah is expecting her 3rd, hopefully a girl this time, perhaps to help civilize her two brothers (ages 2 and 5).

I live in a very small town where I am part of the scenery. Everyone knows I am deaf here, and react accordingly. The other day, I was a little startled while waiting for a new battery to be installed in my Subaru. A young girl with a baby sat down across from me and apparently tried to make a conversation, and the rest of the people in the waiting room told her I was deaf. (Again, small town!) I was alternately reading The Oregonian and thumbing away on my Blackberry. All of a sudden this young woman pointed at the newspaper and exclaimed "You can read!" It had been a very long time since I'd had a put down like this, so I was "temporarity mute", but not for long! My smart mouth got busy and I replied with, "Can YOU read?" And she came back with "Not very well", which softened the conversation somewhat. She was there along enough to apoligize to me over and over again and came and hugged me before she left. All's well that ends well.

I have added to my family. I now have FOUR CATS instead of two, and yes, Lenny is still squawking away. One of my grand daughters found two tiny kittens, a third had died, and since there was no sign of the mother, she took them home and bottle fed them. Then later brought them to me, all the way from Modesto, Ca. One kitten is a "Rag Doll" type, with that sort of coloring, and the second is a blonde with lots of white markings. "Ali and Peach". They are really adorable cats, so loving and (now) they are getting along pretty well with BG and Kula. I was a little bit surprised when I found out how much vets cost now, and for TWO, not one at a time! Both vets are female. Hurrah!

I bought new vinyl windows for the older part of the house, to keep the 145 mph gusts from blowing me away. One thing at a time. Next will be new countertops and kitchen sink. Then maybe a new set of wheels! 'One thing at a time, I do not do well when I have too many things to think about!

The new year has started out well, everyone in the family is working. For that I am very thankful.

'Until next time. The Tempurpedic is calling. Happy New Year!

A Typical Day

2009-07-14T17:51:00.000-07:00

I am beginning to wonder if anything ever goes right?

I recently paid $150.00 to have my fax machine brought up to date. Thanks to Sorenson and the new numbers, my distinctive ringing is all fouled up. Impossible to straighten out. After I paid, I found out that my fax still does not ring appropriately. I cannot tell it from any other call. :(

So, my dentist failed at letting me know that my appointment was canceled. I drove all the way to Astoria only to be told to come back next week! Then on the way home a semi with 2 trailers (a cement truck) jackknifed on the highway (two lane highway) and traffic was tied up for a very long time. Thank goodness for my Blackberry, my grand daughter, Leah and I were able to compare problems. Little Joey lost one shoe. Adrian was a brat downtown when he didn't get to go on all of the rides that he wished. And ME STUCK in traffic, thank God for air conditioning!

Poor Grandma. Poor GREAT-grandma! At least we are going to have a good dinner tonight. With my state of mind I hope I can enjoy it!

Weather is great -- windy, but sunny and more like "beach weather". Leah pulls the two little boys around in my John Deere wagon that Joe gave me for my birthday years ago, to haul veggies from the garden.

I am looking forward to my TempurPedic in a couple of hours and my housekeeper and her son will start tomorrow!

Until next time, Lantana

"Music Within"

2009-07-09T01:23:00.000-07:00

Please see the movie, "Music Within", 2007. It is a lovely movie if you can overlook the F words! It involves the instigator of the ADA Law and is extremely touching.

I actually knew Art Honeyman, he used to come to dinner at Woodstock House where I moonlighted during the summer months and on weekends. He was married at the time. He used a pencil in his mouth to type out words for his books. But that was years ago, I can imagine that he graduated to more sophisticated writing methods.

CP people have always held a fascination for me. I ache for them. I am so glad I had so much contact with the people that I did, their lives are not easy.

Hugs, until next time, Patty/Lantana

Heavy Hearts

2009-06-20T12:14:00.000-07:00

This old gal has been around for a long time. I have outlived many of my students! And I can truthfully say that I have never seen so many people with depression and heavy hearts. You turn on the t.v. and you get 99 1/2 % bad news. You try to change the channel to something light and cheerful (such as Jon and Kate Plus 8) and find that the news media has ruined that program, too. I joined Netflix, hoping that picking out my own movies might be a plus, with nothing forced on me, but many of the Netflix movies are not closed captioned and I send them back without viewing the full movie.

True, we deafies are so much better off than we were 50 years ago when counting our new conveniences. I often count my blessings.

Personally I find a great deal of comfort in my backyard with my flowers. When a big windstorm comes my way and flattens the Lupins, I tell myself that they will come back next year. I smile when I see the many lady bugs and give a sigh of relief when I see the bees doing their job. Mother Nature is grand!

When I am relaxing (when!) my two cats take their places on my lap and often Lenny my Solomon Island Eclectus parrot will join us. Lenny is the boss and the cats do not dare step out of line or they get a fat lip!

Until next time ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Children and heartaches

2009-06-09T20:57:00.000-07:00

I would like to make a comment on Sherry's blog, even tho I am banned from there. Your daughter's problem sounds very much like Toxic Shock Syndrome. I have had several people I know experience this and know the symptoms. Does your daughter wear artificial fingernails? That can be a huge culprit.

My own son is recuperating from his 2nd hip replacement and this time he had to have a new femur. He is doing nicely and is back to work now for Wells Fargo.

I am so terribly busy this time of year, and this year, without a hubby to contribute. I prefer to spend my time in the yard but sooner or later I need to face the inside of the house! Today I was delivered another new t.v. (identical to the bedroom t.v.) this one is for the living room and to replace DH's 35 year old Sony console, (which still works!). Now I do not have to go to bed to watch t.v. My older DVD is with the new tv, leaving the BluRay in the bedroom. I still do not savvy the Bluray, anyone want to buy it? I am too old to wrack my brain over something so trivial!!

I have passed the 1st aniversary of my husband's sudden death. We all react differently. He was my soul mate and my best friend, so I am still hurting badly. 'Keep trying to find something to look forward to! Meanwhile I have a pleasant home to live in and I have no money problems. Joe was very generous with me, without being stupid. He knew what he was doing when we made our our Wills.. If I see something I want, I buy it. Right now my big priority is new windows for this house. Our 135 mph wind gusts are hard on the windows, so I need to switch to vinyl that have more "give". Hopefully the new windows will outlast me!! Owning a home is a big responsibility and very expensive! I take a certain pride in this house and do my best to take good care of it and be creative so that it looks nice, inside and out!

My only advice to those who have lost (or are losing) loved ones, is: Move on. YOU are still here. The guilt will go away in time, but not without it's stabbing reminders. We did the best we could with what we knew at the time. Find something to look forward to. "There is a reason for everything under the sun".

Regards, Patty, in Seaside who is enjoying her flowers and the beautiful seasonal weather.

Driving Daze

2009-04-28T16:57:00.000-07:00

All of us wonder at some time or another how long we will be able to drive. I recall my dad behind the wheel at age 90+ without an updated drivers liscense and when we children tried to intervene, he had a fit! My dad was a farmer and mechanically inclined, so there was no way my brothers could dismantle the pickup without Dad knowing exactly what had been done! His insurance company would not renew him, and we kids lived with baited breath, praying that he would not crash into someone and cause serious injuries. The local police were no help, they claimed that so long as they didn't catch him breaking the law, there was nothing they could do.

In my father's case it is very sad because "way back then" when my dad was very young, like 10, 11, or 12 years old, the male children were expected to be out in the fields driving the tractor and throwing hay bales into a pickup truck and driving the truck to the barn. Driving was in their blood, many men of dad's time cannot even recall NOT driving. We have pictures of my own brother driving the tractor when he was only 5 years old.

So this trip to Portland to be with my son in OHSU gave me a little taste of "elder driving". Our little town where our farm is does not even have a stop light! Seaside has plenty of lights, but we "locals" know all the shortcuts to avoid the tipsy tourists! Downtown Portland is a different story. I never realized just how different until I became a "senior driver"!

When leaving for my hotel, which was less than a mile from OHSU, my daughter in law suggested that she "follow me". A couple of blocks and I realized that this wasn't going to work, so we decided that I WOULD FOLLOW HER. As it turned out, the internet maps the hospital printed out for us were wrong, very wrong! And at some point my family and I became separated. If it hadn't of been for our Blackberries, I might still be there wandering around!

So from now on I will know my limitations. AND the limitations of Internet maps!!

A few words about my hotel. I had asked for a hearing impaired room. The hotels give a discount to families who have loved ones in OHSU. The Marriot was one of them and bingo they had a room for deafies! The first Marriot we arrived at was the wrong one. Back into the car my luggage went. (I do not travel lightly!). The 2nd Marriot was "it", finally. 'Interesting, 2 Marriots within blocks of one another. (Sigh, poor Grandma!) But there was no place to park! The nice girl at the desk, who spoke SOME English assured me that I could park in their covered, "safe and secure" parking for only $21.00. Anyone who is familiar with downtown Portland knows that it is not safe to be more than a few steps from your vehicle! So I sprung for the fancy parking spot.

The Hearing Impaired Room was a nice surprise. Almost like an apartment with a bedroom, kitchen, living room and dinette (and a huge bathroom). The bottled water was only $3.00 EACH. (Shades of Disneyland!) And I had my very own doorbell outside of my front door. Clincher: all of the strobes to the doorbell were behind doors, out of sight! That was okay, no one was going to visit me anyway.

So in ending this tale, I will assure everyone that I will be sticking closer to home from now on. Taxi's are there for a purpose!

As a footnote, there is a "tram" (like a Gondola) from OHSU to the hotel district on the waterfront for $2.00. Guess what? I passed on that! Ugh, with my poor balance I can imagine what people would think!

Until a next time, Hugs, Lantana

More Interesting Tidbits

2009-04-25T12:15:00.000-07:00

When you have a large family, the excitement never seems to diminish. Bless our Blackberries and our laptops, etc. for enabling us to keep in close touch with one another. No longer are we deafies second class citizens always depending on others to do our communicating for us during a serious and difficult situation.

As some of you know, my youngest son JJ has Ankylosing Spondylitis. It is a rare form of arthritis where your spine fuses together and any movement is very painful. Many years ago he was bringing his daughter home from the babysitters and a woman slammed into his car broadside, causing JJ's car to roll several times before it became
upright in someone's front yard. His daughter was fine, buckled into her car seat, but JJ found himself on the floorboards with one leg wrapped around his neck!

Well he had a badly crushed pelvis, partially due to the fact that his bones had become brittle over the years from the meds he had been taking for pain. The Medical hospital U of Ca/Davis did a great job of patching him up. That was quite a few years ago, and now he lives in Washington State and the time came to replace his "borrowed" hip. No surgeon in the Northwest would touch his case, -- except one. This doctor practices putting people back together after their bones have been destroyed by cancer. He is a highly skilled and valued surgeon. Everyone assured JJ that this doctor was the right man for the job!

I am very happy to say that JJ came out of his newest surgery a transfigured man; pain, yes, but he felt good and very, very optimistic. This time he had the good sense to warn the staff, "No Morphine". That was the key. Morphine does such strange things to people!

One scare day before yesterday when his leg and foot swelled up like a balloon. JJ's wife and daughter are both nurses and of course their suspicions were "Bloodclot!", but a trip back to OHSU and an ultra sound assured everyone that there was no bloodclot. Whew!

I stayed in a hotel in downtown Portland for several days during the operation and recovery, and the whole family was able to keep in touch via our Blackberries.

The Blackberries did not keep us from getting lost in Portland, but they helped us getting un-lost!

But that is another story.

Until then, hugs from Lantana

Update on Lantana's "Longitude"

2009-04-07T16:20:00.001-07:00

Well, well, another month has gone by. I guess I am one of those "once a month" people? At my age, once a month is better than nothing!

'A little family excitement. My married granddaughter's car was stolen from a theatre parking lot, when they exited the movie their car had vamoosed, but the thieves were nice enough to pile up the baby carseats and personal things out of the car first and left on the pavement. The next morning the police found the car "professionally chopped up". A close friend of mine who is a Wa. State Patrolman said it was the most professional job he had ever seen! Yes, it was a Honda, and had been customized.

Spring Break is over and my younger granddaughters have come and gone. It was nice to be waited on, instead of my doing all the work. Their ages, 13 and 17 were just right this time and they were able to walk downtown and on the beach and go to the movies on their own. Isn't it great that kids nowdays can text home letting Grandma know everything is okay?! And that they are ready to be picked up from the movie? We 3 had one meal a day OUT. This is because the older girl is a vegetarian and I thought it would be easier on ME if she had a more comfortable choice of victuals. Actually, I am somewhat of a vegetarian myself, and fortunately we have a large selection of fish here on the Coast.

My Funny Farm might be sold. I have received an offer and with a little work from my lawyer, it may happen. I will carry the contract for 5 years and then be cashed out. There is still 4 acres of empty land tho that is also for sale. It has two road frontages and a woman vet is considering it for a brand new Veterinary Hospital. She was interested several years back when it WASN'T for sale!

I have been out and about in my yard, but my CTS hand will not allow me to use pruners yet. I am going to try something different the next time we have a decent day. I have not yet had the left hand done, and I understand from deaf friends that I might be able to have a "bandaid" operation on the left side because it is not as far advanced as the right side was.

I planted a row of Broccoli on the South side of this house, it is a cold weather crop, and I have never tried growing it here, only at the farm, so I am anxious to see what happens. My Vietnamese next door neighbers eyes are glowing! Such nice people, and so talented, their yard should be a layout in a magazine! I wish they would invite me for brunch, or at least to sample their Kim Chee! I love Kim Chee.

Thanks to my buddy Banjo's influence and advice, I now have a new t.v. and BluRay. I am enjoying it alot and appreciate the fact that I have Netflix so I know what is Bluray and what is not! My young granddaughters were very helpful with the installations and making their poor Grandma understand what was happening! What's Greek to me is a walk in the park to them.

So perhaps I will not have to wait a month to write in my blog again. Spring has sprung with lots of interesting things happening.

To friends, family and otherwise: I am doing okay. Losing a large part of your life takes a big toll, but we women are strong and eventually there is a rebound ------- somwhere. Thanks for caring.

Lantana

DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME

2009-04-07T16:07:00.000-07:00

Wise Indian!

Lantana and Seek Geo in Seaside

2009-03-08T19:27:00.000-07:00

This was when Geo and Jes came to Seaside. Jes went off to shoot pictures and Geo and I had some good laughs!

AnotherExperience to Share!

2009-03-07T14:13:00.000-08:00

Here I am again, big as life and twice as ugly. I guess it is about time that I share my CTS surgery with my fellow bloggers.

First of all, what made me go to the doctor in the first place? Well BOTH of my hands went numb during the night, EVERY night. I mean COMPLETELY NUMB and the feeling did not go away until I had been up and around for several hours. There was alot of pain in the wrist and elbow area on both hands, the right hand was the worse. I was almost useless and spent most of my time picking up things off of the floor that I had knocked down or dropped because I had no feeling of hanging onto something. Just going to the grocery store was a nightmare! My late husband had been through it, including the operations on both hands, also my middle son, Brian (who is a butcher for Safeway) had the very same thing done and has recuperated nicely. My own situation was/is more complicated because I have arthritis in both hands.

When my husband had his CT surgery, they merely gave him a Valium, and proceeded to operate and it took very little time, it was kind of an "assembly line" type event.
But I had a bonafide operating room and was put to sleep! The pre-op hypo was so nice, I could use a few more of those, like daily!

I can see alot of changes in the system to make money on CTS Surgery because it is so common nowdays. I had no less than 4 appointments before I was finally operated on! This was kind of aggrivating because at the Pre-Op it was just for family history, and the doctor already had all of that because he was the one who did my knee replacement! However the pre-op was nice in a way because this is where they inform you what to expect and how to care for the incision afterwards.

I arrived at the Sugical Center by taxi on surgery day, being that I chose to spend the night before in a hearby motel. After the operation, my daughter picked me up, drove me back to the Coast and stayed with me for 2 weeks. You cannot take a taxi home and you must assure the surgical staff that you will have someone at home to help you.

If you are anticipating CTS surgery, please furlough your 501 Jeans for the duration, and any pants with buttons that do not fall magically in place! 'Forget your recliner chair, you will not be able to operate the wooden lever with that hand. Women: forget about wearing a bra for at least a week, maybe two! Even squeezing the toothpast tube was a major undertaking! In short, I was miserable. I am normally a very independent person and having to depend on someone else for almost every move was very irritating.

FORGET the tongue in cheek, scary, warning statement, "Who is gonna wipe?". THAT will be the least of your problems! Most surgical centers do only one hand at a time. Doing both at once would be quite a truama and not something I would attempt.

Yes, I had an interpreter. I asked for one for surgery day and for post-op. The interpreter and I had a good laugh when I commented to the doctor that he forgot to tell me that I couldn't put on a bra! He laughed and replied, "I wouldn't know about that, I was always better at taking them off!" My interpreter and I cracked up.

On the 25th of March I will find out more about my left hand.

Finally Some Sunshine!

2009-01-17T13:38:00.000-08:00

One really must actually SEE a flood before they can believe it. EVERYTHING is various shades of grey! If I were an artist, I would try to paint what I have seen, but I cannot draw a cat sitting backside!

The wonderful neighbors surrounding our farm have been a blessing. And the fact that we can text and email back and forth is something I thank God for every day. Disasters are not exactly a deaf person's cuppa. But we learn fast!

My Seaside house looks nice, after a visit from our man who comes a few times a year to do the heavy work. I even went out and scrubbed down the two porches, they were pretty messy from dead, frozen plants. I have a stiff mop that swivels so I can get in between the various posts (that are always around a deck!). The new Spray Cleaner With Bleach is a Godsend, that and my trusty BIOKLEEN that will make short work of almost any kind of stain or mold!

While out in the yard, I found ONE shingle on the ground that must have come off of our cedar shingle roof, so I will need to have someone check. Disasters attract every crook known to man and they particularly enjoy ripping off (deaf) old ladies. However, Joe taught me well and I have enough friends around town to protect me. And YOU know that we deafies have feelers out that can feel a crook a mile away!

It's only January, and so we still have alot of WEATHER coming, but I am thinking positive.

On Feb. 5th I will have my right Carpal Tunnel Syndrome operated on. My daughter, Jan Marie is coming down with her 2 Aussie Shepherds to keep me from overdoing it. For my LEFT CTS my younger grand daughters will come down during Spring Break and see me through the 2nd operation. I hope to talk them into cleaning house, but they are teenagers so I do not expect much!

Such wonderful news on T.V. about the Miracle On The Hudson. I think we, as a people needed this story to lift our spirits and recuperate from the Bush Presidency!

Until next time, Yours, Lantana

2008 ~Sigh~

2008-12-31T18:26:00.000-08:00

My brother and I share a birthday, 08/08 and we were kind of excited because in 2008 we would celebrate on 08/08/08! We had heard that young couples rushed to reserve that date to be married on because they felt that it would bring them luck. I hope these couples fared better than I did.

Well, before 08/08/08 rolled around, I had become a widow. The creek on our farm became a river and flooded our barn and living area, all the rugs had to be thrown out. A few weeks later we had 2 feet of snow there, with heavy freezing rain on top of the snow. When the weather warmed slightly, the snow/ice slid off of the roof, taking everything with it, including the gutters, and taking some shrubs and trees along on it's journey when it finally landed.

I adopted Joe's barn cat,BG, who is a gentle soul, but hey, she was raised a barn cat! When she moved to town with me, I had to entertain all kinds of varmits that she brought in, including a baby skunk, who marched boldly across my bedroom floor! "Oh, that is what cats do", you say? Well to get these unwelcome guests into the house, BG had to drag them up a drain pipe to the front deck and then through the sliding door (which I stupidly left open for her). The live snakes she brought up the pipe in her mouth, I handily removed from the premisis with a chopstick! Some of her offerings, I could not quite tell what species they came from. "Mystery Meat".

When we added to our bedrooms quite a few years ago, the contractor included a strobe fire alarm which he handily installed on the ceiling directly above my side of the bed. Well after hubby was gone, this darned strobe started going off at intervals, two nights in a row! The first night, I slept with the pillow over my head, thinking that everything would be okay "later". The second night, guess what, I got strobed again most of the night. Ever try to SEE with one of those things in operation in the same room?! I finally got out of bed in the middle of the night, found my handy "kitchen stool" climbed up and yanked a wire that mysteriously stopped everything! Keep in mind I am not supposed to climb ladders, it could mean the death of my lovely knee replacement!

There's more, but you can get the drift. Farewell to the year of 2008!

Latest Buzz

2008-12-02T19:05:00.000-08:00

We deafies got notified a short time ago that there was going to be an interpreted Disaster meeting in the next down on December 1st -- last night.
Well, when you live on the Coast, ONE Disaster Plan does not fit all! Everything depends on your location, how close you are to the ocean, the Columbia River, etc. etc. It so happened that this particular meeting had nothing to do with ME, since I am only 3 blocks from the ocean itself and to "escape" I would have to cross 2 bridges, both with rivers underneath! 'Understand, you cannot drive if there is a Tsunami warning or an Earthquake coming, the roads would be havoc, with panic and traffic jams. You must WALK (if you know where to walk to!). I could scramble to the top of Tillamook Head, a 6 mile trek (if the trail is not muddy) and it is all UPHILL. Puff, puff, I think not! I could take my chances legging it over two bridges, if someone did not push me out of the way before I began. I could remain in my own home, with the understanding that I would probably become part of the oceanic food chain within minutes. (Or) like the nice man remarked, I could wait for some nice fireman to come by and hoist me over his shoulder and carry me away to safety! My response? "Oh please, let it be a Calendar Fireman!"
Whatever happens, happens. We were not designated to be here forever!
Yours, Lantana

General Update

2008-11-20T17:23:00.000-08:00

An online friend contacted me and wanted to know if I was "allright" because I had not been posting in my Blog. Yeah, I guess I am okay, the days keep going by, or rather whizzing by. Perhaps that is because I get up late and it get's dark so danged early! The most comfortable thing to do is crawl into my Tempur Pedic with the electric blanket on HIGH and watching the News or a Netflick flick. Both cats sleep with me now, or perhaps I should say ON ME! Their warm bodies are so comforting!

Some bad luck last week. Our farm flooded, due to heavy rains for several days in a row and I had over an inch of water and silt in the shop and the apartment area. Talk about depressing! I even found a Chum lying in the backyard! My daughter and her sig other came down and rented a water exacuvator which was a Godsend, but we had to throw all of the area rugs in the garbage. Or rather into the back of Joe's 350 Ford Pickup for a later trip to the local dump. I don't even know where the dump IS! Hey, that's a guy-job!!

Update on Jeeves, he can be a giant pain in the posterior. He get's hung up in the most unlikely places and gobbles up the cats' toys. He can really gobble up the dirt, tho. Nobody's perfect! At least he puts himself away when he is done.

I had the front slider replaced with a French Door. With this type of door I can open both sides and wheel Lenny's cage out onto the deck and use my steamer on it. I was afraid to use the steamer inside the house, figuring I would wind up cleaning bird poop off of my cedar ceiling! Arrrrgh! As things stand it looks like I will have to wait until next summer for some decent weather to work in! Ahh the joys of living on The Oregon Coast!

My oldest grand daughter and her husband come down and help me around the house. They have two toddlers, one boy will be 3 in February and the baby, Joey will be a year old next month. Too many December birthdays!! But now I can use my "age" and just send money. Who wants to shop with 125 mph wind gusts? I used to. :(

I enjoy writing in my blog, but first I have to have something to say! So if I am AWOL occasionally it is because my life is going through a quiet period.

Hugs, Lantana

I Bought Myself a Butler!

2008-10-12T13:17:00.000-07:00

My husband, Joe almost always did the vacuming in our household. Being that we have two floors here, it is pretty tiring job. Luckily I had the foresight to buy an Oreck, and they are light and easy to carry up and down the stairs. Somewhere along the line I started a vacume cleaner collection! Dustbusters, cannisters, small plug ins for the stairway, and a cord-free upright for small jobs down in the laundry room. I couldn't live without my Dustbusters!

An online friend tipped me off about what he was buying, so I did alot of research and decided I had to add to my collection!
Meet "Jeeves" my new iRobot Roomba! His name-sign is a "J" on top of your wrist where the "work" sign is.

My whole family was so excited and my adult grandkids programmed it, so it wasn't until the last couple of days that he and I got to know one another. It takes awhile to find the places where iRobot will get stuck, and being deaf, I cannot hear his distress call, so I kind of try to keep him in my sight and if he disappears for a long length of time, I know he is yelling for me from a corner somewhere!
At first he would get stuck under the sofa, an end table was just the right height for him to slip under and get "hung up". Today since I had planned the cleaning in advance, I shoved my bread board between the sofa and the end table. Problem solved.
The best thing about this guy is that he keeps that evil dust under your bed and sofa from accumilating! The first time I used him under my bed, I found 2 earrings and a cat toy in his belly! I have not yet taken him downstairs where more bedrooms are and another bath and the laundry room. I did some research beforehand and Amazon has the best deal with plenty of freebies to boot!

On another matter our city gifted us with another recycling container. It is huge and has a bright red top! So I hid it in the garage, which should work out okay because there will be no "wet" refuse to stink up the place. Painted on the top is what you CAN and CANNOT place in the container. Most things you can, except glass. This morning I cut myself washing out a cat food can! Grr. I am still learning! These new barrels will be picked up only every other week and I have already noticed a huge reduction in my regular garbage can. Of course my garbage disposal is a big help, too.

So, at 75 years old I am still learning and enjoy every second of it!

Your's, Lantana

Where Has The Time Gone ? ?

2008-09-30T21:24:00.000-07:00

Over a month has gone by since I last wrote in my blog! 'Lots and lots of paperwork, doing the chores of 2 people, and taking good care of myself, while preserving the memory of my husband, Joe who passed away on June 2nd of this year. Joe and I learned a great deal from one another, and I, as the survivor am the lucky one because I get to continue to use my (our) knowledge!

In his Will, Joe directed our lawyer to assist me, and to be paid by Joe's own estate. This lawyer, having both an Oregon and Washington license has been such a huge asset. Correction: His Paralegal has been the asset, the lawyer comes and goes and his magic words are pure gold, ( at Joe's expense).

The 1980 Corvette has been sold. I sign the title over tomorrow. The Realtor assures me that she has received many calls asking about the farm, but (obviously) many of the calls were from nosey neighbors. Our Funny Farm is an unique property and not something a bank would consider financing (particularly during today's ditzy market), this special SOMEONE who purchases the amazing property that Joe and I created will need to have some cash in his pocket. But it will be worth it for them. It is a genuine lovenest, trust me.

Right now I am not certain what my plans are. I may move back to Washington State and kiss The Oregon Coast goodbye. Or I will become a a bonafide Oregonian and stay here in this Seaside home until the big Tsunami takes me out and adds me to the Pacific Ocean foodchain. I am going by my vibes and taking one day at a time.

Meanwhile I have been enjoying our annual and traditional (and famous) Indian Summer. Such amazing sunsets, and I love the warm days and the cool nights where you almost have to turn on your electric blanket. My health is good, I am mentally stable, and my family has been extremely supportive. I live in one of the most beautiful parts of the world. What else is there?

Yours, Lantana

Oil Can Henry's

2008-08-25T10:48:00.000-07:00

A few years back, Hubby and I were thrilled when we read that Oil Can Henry's was building a brand new site just a few blocks from our beach home. We formerly had to go all the way to Astoria to have an oil change, so this big news made us feel warm and fuzzy inside. What an improvement for our town!!

I was thrilled to death the first time I used these new facilities, gee, you stay in your car and read a free USA Today, file your fingernails and wipe off the driver's side of the car with handiwipes. What service! How lucky can you get??

Right? Wrong! This place is pure torture for a deaf woman. These guys bombardier you with mysterious automomotive lingo, they bring out their clipboards with serious and determined looks on their faces. Me: "I just want an oil change". Attendant: "But ~~~~~~~~~~~"(?) Me: "My husband told me to get an oil change period!" Attendant: (Waving mysterious looking devices around) "~~~~~~~~~~".

This happened every single time I went for an oil change, so my husband, feeling sorry for me, took over that icky chore.

Now I am stuck! I went to Oil Can Henry's recently and wound up driving out on them without having anything done. I went back to our old haunt, an oil changing place owned and operated by Russian Immigrants and who treat me kindly with sincere and helful body language!

Problem solved!

Epilogue

2008-08-24T17:05:00.000-07:00

"It is always something that happens to someone else". Don't you believe it.

Luckily for me I have always been well-read, from the time I went deaf at age 10 until the present, I read everything I could get my hands on including "Death and Dying". 'Losing a spouse cannot be compared with other family deaths, such as those of your parents or a cherished child. My blog here was intended for The Death Of A Spouse and no other. I write only what I know.

Joe and I had always met a certain need for one another. 'Like a couple of sheep-herding shepherd dogs. He went left and I went right and when it was over we met and compared notes. He had chores that he enjoyed (and I did what was left over, which as a mother of 5 children, I was used to). We both inherited love of the land and for quite a few years we put our whole lives into our mini-farm the fresh, home grown broccoli and string beans and fresh rhubarb pie. Our beach home was more like a place where you can throw your hat on the floor and relax and where we could enjoy the terrific sunsets and stroll hand in hand along the "Prom" which is the Western version of a "Boardwalk". We could be "residents" one minute and then walk 4 blocks to town and enter the vacation zone. We had a Timeshare on Maui where we spent Feb 8th to March 8th each year. We would leave during the winter and arrive home to Spring! (If Mother Nature cooperated).
That was then, this is now.

Our Funny Farm will shortly be up for sale. My ASL interpreter is also a liscensed Realtor in both Oregon and Washington and she and I are putting our heads together. The Corvettes and other vehicles will be sold on consignment by a local dealer. BG the BarnCat has been adopted by me and is happy here and runs in and out the top floor by climbing up and down a crooked pine tree. (I won't mention the baby skunk she brought into the house awhile back).

It has been almost 3 months now and I have made good progress. Joe and I had a very special love, a very unique relationship and our love will last me for the rest of my life. I can feel him around me, helping to make decisions and comforting me when I become frustrated with "too many things to do".

I am far enough away from my grown children that they do not feel obligated to drop in on "poor mom" to see how she is doing. Almost all of that is being done via IM, Blackberry or emails. When I need them they will be here pronto, and that includes my adult grandchildren. "Just let me know when you need me". My oldest grandson recently put up a curbside mailbox for me, so now I can get Snail Mail here at the beach house. My grand daughter, who is the mother of my 2 great-grandsons, recently showed up with her mother and cleaned my whole house.

I have no reason to worry about the immediate future. There are no money worries. I am in reasonably good health for my age and can still spend a whole day working in the yard, before I collapse on my Tempur Pedic.

I feel blessed because I have known the love of a good man, live in one of the most beautiful parts of the world, and am well able to take care of myself.

Lantana, August 24, 2008

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-08-18T19:20:00.000-07:00

(I took some time off to drive up to the Hood Canal and attend a 100th birthday celebration of my former childhood housemother. Yes, she turned 100, and I turned 75 on the same weekend!)

(Part 6) Soon after we moved to the Coast, some 17 years ago we met a new friend. Actually, he worked in our yard and did the heavy stuff for us, and it was a long time before we actually found out that he was an ordained minister! He has always gone by the handle of "Dr. Dan" and at the time, little did we know that the "Doctor" meant "Doctor Of Theology"! He was also the son of a minister. Many years later, as I sat in the hospital holding hands with my deceased husband, I thought of Dr. Dan in a warm and comforting way and asked the hospital to call him at the same time they contacted my family. Thankyou God for sending me Doctor Dan!

Dr. Dan and I together planned Joe's Celebration of Life. We prayed together and it was after this visit from our old friend that I was able to carry on and do the planning and creating that had to be done. To help Dan a little, I loaned him Joe's senior high school yearbook with all of the traditional scribblings, and from this, Dan was able to build in his mind, a complete Joe. Miraculously, everything fell into place without any problems.

We held the Memorial Ceremony at Joe's and my beloved Funny Farm, CREEKSIDE. Many of the family came in their R.V.'s and stayed the entire weekend. The day before, Joe's 17 year old grandson came and mowed the lawn. Dr. Dan showed up on schedule and wandered among the crowd, being introduced and getting a feel of the group. He was casually dressed as we all were, but Dr. Dan stood out because he had a tie on with a picture of Jesus on it.

Joe's Kubota was sitting proudly in the long driveway. Joe had very few family left, only some cousins and the grandson. One cousin and his wife were able to attend after driving a long distance. My own family did Joe proud, they were all there, all of my children, my 2 brothers and their wives, my neices and newphews, and a neighbor who helped Joe build The Barn. My two great-grandsons made themselves known, even my daughter's 2 Aussie Shepherds layed at Dr. Dan's feet. Lenny the Parrot was on my shoulder. And a very important part of the ceremony was Clyde, who grew up with Joe and who remained in touch right up until the time of Joe's death.

The ceremony was beautiful and my daughter, JanMarie interpreted Dan's wonderous and loving words to me. He had received approriate vibes while working the crowd earlier and everyone felt comfortable with his sermon, everyone loved him, no one felt uneasy or out of place. Each person there, if they wished, got to speak up.

Clyde and I sprinkled Joe's ashes along the bank of the creek among the hundreds of Willow trees that Joe had single handedly and lovingly planted each Spring. Dan led everyone (except me) in singing Amazing Grace. I felt a certain peace in knowing that I had planned a loving and unique tribute to my beloved Joe.

It was an elegant send off. The nicest one I have ever attended.

Afterwords there was a huge potluck held in Joe's workshop, among his saws and his precious farm equipment. The salads sat on his table saw. There were yummy dishes sitting behind his grinder. His numerous hammers stood at attention.

Next: Epilogue

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-08-05T19:48:00.000-07:00

(Part 5) Joe and I of course often joked about old age and frequently made wisecracks about life in a nursing home,and what might or might not happen if and when we possibly wound up in one. Joe made me promise that I would be sure to scratch the "Crown Jewels" when he became too old to do so (or to find them, as he often wisecracked). He loved his beach home and often stated that he would only leave it "feet first". The first request is nil of course, but he followed through on the second.
Joe and I purchased property early in our marriage over in Washington State because we were Washingtonians at heart and did not want to have to change anything, including our drivers licenses. This property was almost 2 acres and had a creek on 3 sides. We found it the first day we began searching. Over the years we enjoyed developing it and Joe was proud of his huge lawn and happily battled Moles that insisted on making ugly hills on the large expanse of green. We also had a problem with Beaver and we had to hire a certified trapper to relocate these critters at $95.00 a pop. Our neighbors to the West of us were transplanted Californians and considered Beavers "cute" and a welcome part of Mother Nature. I it wasn't for Joe they would have had over flowing septic tanks every year!
This property was mostly covered at the beginning with wild Blackberry bushes. These bushes were another irritation and a constant battle, and to try and choke them out, Joe faithfully cut and planted Willow branches each spring. You cut one and shove it into the ground and presto! The following Spring you have a willow tree over 6 feet tall!
Eventually we had a garden in raised beds, planted our own fruit orchard and enjoyed the one-bedroom apartment that was part of a huge pole building that Joe had built. I did all of the planting, the veggies and flowers both. We worked well together and called this plot our Funny Farm. Our families came there to camp in their R.V.'s and we had many,many family gatherings and reunions there with pictures taken for posterity. Eventually we purchased another 4 acres across the street, which was half wooded and which also included a creek and 2 road frontages.
Joe loved this place so much and was so proud of what we had created together. When his health began to fail, he could not bring himself to put it up for sale, but hung on, doing what he could and with me tagging along beautifying things. Joe was a happy man on his John Deere riding lawnmower and he rapidly became a legend in that small town. Remember, Joe bragged that he had finally found a town without a stoplight!
Our Funny Farm is where I chose to hold Joe's Celebration of Life and Memorial.
(To be continued)

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-08-04T20:20:00.000-07:00

(Part 4) My personal idea of "filing" is to leave it on top of my desk until I remember to pay it. Luckily for me, most debts these days are paid Online. Joe did not trust "them" and still paid his bills the old fashioned way, and he paid them the same day they arrived! Somehow during our marriage we fell into a comfortable style where he paid what he was comfortable with (in regard to household expenses) and I paid the rest. I bought all of the groceries, he paid all of the property taxes. We rarely discussed money, there was always enough and neither one of us ever exclaimed, "Turn out some of these lights, this is costing me money!" We just didn't need to worry about those things.
Joe was very fond of 100 bills. Regularly, I found one waiting for me on the kitchen counter just before a shopping trip, or a holiday to visit my kids. After Joe died, I found 100 dollar bills here and there that he had left for me, each one neatly sealed in a crisp white envelope. But THEN there were two of us, suddenly and without warning there was only ONE. ME!
The utilities, the usual household expenses, car licenses, etc. I could deal with. (Before I had married Joe, I had been single for 25 years). But the constant barrage of paperwork due to Joe's death expenses, bank accounts, mysterious letters with words that never quite made sense, was making my teeth chatter. Luckily I have a son who is a CPA with a degree in Business Administration. 'Occasionally even he was stumped! I went to the Paper Factory and purchased a nice, cheerful cardboard box, covered that was imprinted with flowers and that had a little bow on top. It opened and shut as if it was on hinges. Then I set up the card table in our bedroom and that became my "business office for the moment". Everything that delt with Joe's death went into the flowered box, separate from anything else. My other everyday expenses were delt with SEPARATELY. And on a real desk!
I am happy to report that the card table is now neatly tucked away in the closet where it came from. "The Box" has a new location in our bedroom under my watchful eyes, where it can be updated easily as new surprises arrive. In there is our Official Marriage Liscense From The State Capitol. I keep the death certificates in there (I bought 6), along with our Wills and the expenses that occurred upon Joe's death. It is a bright, uplifting recepticle that I frequently glance through to make sure I have not missed anything.
It seemed to me that everywhere I went I had to show a death certificate. So I cracked wise and began carrying a clipboard (a bright blue CHEERFUL ONE) with all the important stuff attached to that. I never go anywhere without my car, so suddenly I had a rolling business office!
Death is expensive, but only if you allow it to be that way.
(Next, The Memorial Service)
To be continued

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-08-02T21:18:00.000-07:00

(Part 3) Luckily for me I had chosen the right funeral home. While still in the hospital with Joe and being quizzed by the nurses and Social Worker, (when I replied to give me the Mortuary that had been in business here the longest), I sensed good vibes from my choice. 'Having sharp senses is one of the greater benefits of being deaf!
In the past, Joe and I had attended church together only once and that was in Victoria, BC on Christmas Eve. Joe and I are/were staunch believers, but we chose to honor our Creator in our own way. Joe had been through AA many years before I met him and he was successful because he believed in his Higher Being. I had never, ever seen my husband, Joe take a drink. And I had known him for almost 30 years. He was one of the 100% successfully recovered alcoholics.
The mortuary owner was very understanding and there was *no argument* as to a Service. I explained that I chose to have a Celebration of Life a little later when the entire family could get together comfortably and not under duress.
Mortuary businesses can be very helpful if you stand firm and show that you are not interested in the glamour and the nitty gritty of impressing your friends. First, last and always, depend on what YOUR SPOUSE would want, not what YOU choose and forget "what people might think".
This is very useful information that I received from the Director:
CALL THE SOCIAL SECURITY ADMINISTRATION. They will make an appointment for you pronto.
Contact Veterans' Administration if approriate for your situation.
Change the deed on your property and remove the deceased's name from that deed. This is done at the county seat where the property is located. Take a certified Death Certificate with you.
Change the titles and registration of your vehicles. This is done at the Division of Motor Vehicles. Again, you will need a death certificate.
(Me again). You will need a certified Marriage Certificate. Not that cute piece of paper that you both signed at the wedding with stars in your eyes. You will have to contact Vital Statistics in your state. Google it up.
If you have credit cards, outstanding debts, etc. etc. contact the appropriate companies at once. There are life insurance policies with some credit cards.
In my own case, the funeral directory notified all of the local newspapers and submitted a picture of Joe at no charge. In our hometown where we both grew up, I submitted everything online at a cost of $263.00. I wrote all of the obits myself. No one knew my husband like I did!
In the next chapter I will explain how I coped with all of the paperwork.
(To be continued)

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-08-01T17:34:00.000-07:00

(Part 2): Right on the heels of the police came the medics, including one team from the fire station. Our street was full of emergency vehicles. And, (to my surprise) along with the medics came a woman from the Women's Crisis center. She remained with me for the rest of the evening. The medical team asked me if Joe wanted to live, and I showed them his Will and asked them to go ahead and try to save him. (At this point I was worried about brain damage). They pulled his body out of the bathroom into the living room and explained what they were going to do and that I might not want to watch. They worked for a long time, I would say for 20 minutes or so, then they loaded Joe up and took him to the hospital. We live in a very small town, so most facilities are just blocks away from our home.
When the Crisis Lady and I arrived at the hospital, I had a Chaplain and a social worker waiting for me. The Chaplain and the social worker were both female. They led me to the room where Joe was lying, so still and lifeless, but still warm enough to touch. There for about an hour, Joe and I held hands. I stroked his chest hair, (which I had always enjoyed doing) and kissed him several times. It felt strange not to be kissed back. Joe and I had been very much in love. ~Sigh~
After about an hour, it was "business as usual". A goofy looking nurse with wild white hair come crashing into the room and all I could get was, "His eyes! His eyes!! I assured her that Joe was an organ donor, and then I had a choice of 2 mortuaries in town. I knew nothing about either one, so told them to give me the one that had been around the longest. Within minutes the mortuary was there to pick Joe up. They are available 24/7, in good weather and bad. What a profession! But someone has to do it.
Luckily, because our ages, Joe and I both kept our Wills handy and within reach. We had long ago decided on cremation, so I had no problem giving orders for that. Everything was there in black and white and legal. In our case, our Wills were only a few months old.
The next morning, accompanied by all 3 of my sons, we went to the mortuary to finalize any arrangements. Much to my surprise and delight, the gentleman that came down from Portland to pick up Joe for his eye donation was a CODA. He was fluent in ASL, so I could finally relax for a few minutes at least and understand what was going on. This gentleman from the eye bank would take Joe to Portland, remove the parts that they wanted, and would return him to this mortuary the next morning!
Joe was 71 years old and was not a drinker, I was hoping that perhaps they could use his liver. He had great skin, firm and youthful. Later on, I did hear from the eye bank that 2 successful cornea transplants had been done with Joe's corneas. This letter made me so very happy. Joe had not died in vain.
The Crisis lady drove my car home with me as a passenger the night Joe passed away. We were followed by the Chaplain (in a brand new Mercedes SUV) and they stuck around until they felt I was going to be okay and certain that my family was on it's way. The Chaplain and the Social Worker did all of the notifying for me by telephone. Everyone, the police, the medics, the Chaplain and the Social Worker (and SOME of the nurses) went overboard for me to make sure I was okay and that I understood what was going on. I never did ask for an ASL Interpreter, because the only one we have works hard during the day and I did not want her to be awakened in the middle of the night!
(To be continued)

The Death Of A Spouse

2008-07-31T19:52:00.000-07:00

Finally I feel the urge to share my story with a younger generation who has (probably not) shared my experience. The loss of parents, a close friend, etc. cannot compare with the loss of a spouse. I hope that some of you can benefit from my encounter and my logging it. I mean well, I assure you. I am merely a few steps ahead of you and if I can ease your pain someday with what I have to say, I will feel that I have left a positive and learning legacy.
I can make this long or short, but no matter the length, the pain would still be the same. Death is very final!
Some background information: Joe and I married later in life well past any responsibilities of children, ex-wives or any financial obligations or dependents. We were each well set financially, and comfortably retired on the Oregon Coast with a "hobby farm" over in Washington State 30 miles away, where we had a big garden each year in raised beds and an orchard that we had planted ourselves. Both Joe and I had been raised on Dairy Farms, so we were mutually connected to "the land". Our own "funny farm" has a creek on 3 sides and the town where the property is situated is "seriously" 50 years behind the times. And best of all, (according to my husband) the first town he ever ran into without a stoplight!!
Joe entered our relationship with many, many health problems.' A long list of surgeries, medications and complaints, real or imaginary. 'With each crisis, there were additional complications, there appeared to be no end to it. I adjusted, as Joe did to my deafness and my cultural difference. There was a mutual feeling of, "I can tolerate you if you can put up with me" and we did an excellent job of it. I never felt stunted or neglected in my marriage. We both worked hard on what we were handed to deal with. We were happy and had a marriage that we felt we finally deserved. We truly loved one another.
On June 2nd, 2008, we were in bed for the evening as usual. The computers had been put to sleep and we were watching, "Jon And Kate, Plus 8" on the Learning Channel. We were both chuckling at the cute antics of Jon and Kate's family of 8. Joe got out of bed, nothing unusual, to use the bathroom. Joe had undergone a colostomy in the past and used laxitives extensively, so his abrupt departures from the room was nothing new. Usually he spent some time in the bathroom, and then went to his computer to play a few games before returning to bed for the night. This was his regular routine, without fail, night after night after night.
But on this night, Joe was gone for a little too long. I peeked out at his computer, it was closed. Fearfully I entered his bathroom and found him already dead on the floor. His face was totally blue, almost black. His eyes were closed, there was no movement, no sign of breathing. He was on his side, and I tried to move him,thinking that I could use my CPR knowlege. His body was rigid, I could not move him, not even an inch.
I went downstairs to the TTY (which I had hung onto for just such emergencies), took the cover off, and my mind immediately went blank. I could not recall how to USE the tty! It had been awhile, for sure. So I went back upstairs to the regular telephone, dialed 911 and kept tapping, kept tapping, kept tapping. The police station is less than 5 minutes from our house and they were there immediately. I had left the front door unlocked for them. They rushed in, went into the bathroom and came back with the words, "He is gone!"

(To Be Continued)

Mish Mash

2008-05-15T19:12:00.000-07:00

Aaaarrrgh! It has been over a month since my last blog post. Where has the time gone??

Meanwhile I have been preoccupied with many things. DH was taken to Emergency by ambulance twice in one week. His vitals were all good, so he was sent home with a questionmark. Did I tell you that I am married to a hypochondriac? Geeze Louise, at my husband's age, who will know when his complaints are The Real McCoy??

I was pleasantly surprised when I found that one of the Medics on the ambulance knew Sign Language. How nice for me and I complimented him. He responded with his opinion that it goes with the territory. Good for him!

I recently had my left eye operated on for cataracts. The right eye has already been done (twice). This project was uneventful,but I did enjoy having the same interpreter for each and every appointment. 'Seems like they are weeding them out, the terps who enjoy the medical calls are called rather than those who are indifferent to hospital and doctor's office situations. My terp even suited up and went into the operating room with me. I keep wanting to say "delivery room". Gee,that was a long time ago, why is it stuck in my memory??

My husband was under the weather, so I drove myself to the city where the appointments were to take place. Back and forth between 2 states! I went by taxicab, which gave excellent service and showed a caring attitude. In the end, tho I had to call DH and have him come and get me because I felt that it was too soon to be driving myself home -- my glasses no longer fit, etc. Sigh, I thought getting old was supposed to be easier?

Finally we are having some sunshine, so today I got out into the yard,where I found out that I cannot "take it" like I used to. Or perhaps I need to give my body time to "warm up"??

We just had our kitchen cabinets "refaced". WHAT A MESS! Never again. Dust on everything, I mean SERIOUS DUST. We are also getting new counter tops and a new French Door for our front deck, so I am not going to "deep clean" until that is over.

I think my face got sunburned today. I was working in the front yard and that faces West, so figures. I hope I don't find any additional wrinkles in the morning. I should sleep well tonight, after a hot shower and a peek at Faux News!

Until next time.

Lantana

Traveling With a Disability

2008-04-05T18:33:00.000-07:00

Our dear friend, Geo recently brought up the "hazards" facing deaf folks who are traveling. Geo was mainly referring to flying, but I myself have bumped into some serious irritations while using other modes of travel!

Several years ago we joined a two-week long escorted train trip across Canada, from Vancouver, BC to Nova Scotia. It was a wonderful "fall foilage" trip, one of those "once in a lifetime" journeys. I am completely deaf and my husband extremely HOH from age. I am assertive, he is not and I'd had the most experience traveling as a deaf person. Many things happened but the worst one was when we missed our dinner call. The porter would go through the train yelling: "Dinner A, Dinner B, Dinner C" and so on. We found out fast enough that my husband could *not* hear the porter, so we arrived late for dinner the first night and were refused service! I fixed the "porter problem" by leaving our stateroom door open when we knew the porter would be coming through. And we had a little chat with the head honcho and tipped him well. Our fellow travelers on the same escorted trip were all "seniors" like us and most were well educated and understanding people, which was a real plus. Post Script: The Chef sent to our room two beautiful plates of fruits and cheeses and crackers to make up for our loss of dinner. (He must have known that my favorite meal is cheese and crackers (and wine!)

I have flown across the United States many, many times all alone. 'Once with my hearing ear dog. During a change of flights, I had a difficult time finding a place for my dog to go potty. I was at the Dallas FortWorth airport and GRASS there is pretty difficult to find!! I finally went to "travelers aide" and they found me some grass. Yes, you guessed right, the dog refused to potty. I didn't blame her!

The airlines have changed gates on me so many times, I have lost count. I always solved that problem by picking out a kind and friendly face and imploring for assistance in case there were any changes coming from the loud speaker. This came particularly handy in Sacramento, where it is ALWAYS FOGGY and they changed gates on us frequently! In Sacramento I made friends with a lovely black college girl with the most fascinating dred locks! She was a major help and made the trip actually fun! I will never forget her kindness.

What is really scary for a deafie is those rapid fire commuter planes!! The desk people are of no help, they are usually too busy and forget about you! So another search for someone "going my way"! It's a good thing I have a huge smile!

I do not mind the lack of captions on the airline movies. I would rather read, anyway, or walk the aisle. I like to plan ahead and take along a really special book that I have been dying to read. And then there is always the Sky Mall catalogue with all of the stuff you cannot possibly live without!

Another little trick I usually use is notifying the head attendant on the plane that I am totally deaf and that I would like to know of any changes. When I am headed to Seattle, I don't want to find out that I landed in Vancouver BC due to weather, or some such!

I won't go into the car rental turmoil this time. Particularly for a woman. That is another booby trap and good for another blog posting!

Ahh, and ohh! There is a certified ASL interpreter working as a flight steward for Hawiian Airlines. His name is Jim and he's a real hunk!

Until next time,
Lantana

His? Hers?

2008-03-13T11:46:00.000-07:00

I have enjoyed reading about a few deaf peoples' embarrassing moments. I can imagine that being who we are, and with the disabilities that we have, those moments come quite often for most of us.

Quite a few years ago when I was teaching Sign Language at the local community college, I had a very nice person in my class who spoke up often and asked intelligent and interesting questions. When referring to this person I always said "He" and pointed to "him". Well this went on for sometime, finally during a break, one of the other members of the class took me aside and told me that "that person" was a FEMALE. I responded with, "Are you sure?" and she replied yes, that she played on the women's basket ball team!

'Not being able to hear the young woman's voice really got me into an awkward situation!

LESSONS FROM GEESE

2008-02-12T22:56:00.000-08:00

FACT 1: As each goose flaps it's wings, it creates an "uplift" for the birds that follow. By flying in a "V" formation, the whole flock adds 71% greater flying range than if each bird flew alone.
LESSON: People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier because they are traveling on the trust of one another.

FACT 2: When a goose falls out of formation it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take advantage of the lifing power of the bird immediately in front of it.
LESSON; If we have as much sense as a goose, we stay in formation with those headed where we want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our help to others.

FACT 3: When the lead goose tires, it rotates back into the formation and another goose flies to the point position.
LESSON: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese, people are interdependent on each other's skills, capabilities, and unique arrangements of gifts, talents, or resources.

FACT 4: The geese flying in formation honk to encourage those up front to keep their speed.
LESSON: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging. In groups where there is encouragement, the production is much greater. The power of encouragement is the quality of honking that we seek.

FACT 5: When a goose gets sick wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help protect it. They stay with it until it dies or is able to fly again. Then, they launch out with another formation or catch up with the flock.
LESSON: If we have as much sense as geese, we will stand by each other in difficult times as well as when we are strong.

Mental Health Hot Line

2008-01-30T18:15:00.000-08:00

Hello and welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3.4.5. and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you are dyslexic, press 969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the dash key until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth SS number and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post-trumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep!

If yu have low self-esteem, please hang up. All of our operators are too busy to talk to you.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9, if you have short-term memory loss, press 9, ....... if............

Lest We Forget

2008-01-28T17:55:00.000-08:00

So many controversies lately. Not only in the deaf culture, but everywhere. To quote a not-so-famous man, "Can't we all just get along"?

We will not go there -- politics. Ugh. When I was a young girl and not yet deaf, I can recall my dad exclaiming , "Those so and so Republicans!" . But then later on in his life he became one of them. I think it was more peer pressure from his friends and fellow Elks Brothers than following his own personal feelings and opinion. I have always vowed not to be like my dad. I think for myself and do my own thing, whether it eventually proves to be in the right direction or not. In the end you have to live with your own guilt. No one can do THAT for you.

Ahh, the Deafread blog awards. I happen to know from experience that when these types of things pop up, certain deaf people will do ANYTHING to attend and make their presence known. I know of personal deaf friends who took out a 2nd mortgage on their home in order to attend certain bowling tournaments. Many, many deaf people hocked 10 years off of their lives to attend some other deaf functions, including cruises and European trips. 'Often a couple could afford for only one of them to go, so the man (or perhaps the woman) would go on alone without her/his spouse. What happened is that many marriages were broken up because of the "fooling around".

I have NEVER understood the part of deaf culture that hungers and craves constant good times. And this new Deafread award thingy only adds to the controversy. I am left scratching my head. What next???!

"Blogging" and Vlogging are two separate elements in the deaf world. With Blogging we have to have at least SOME command of English. (This is pretty rare in deafdom). 'Vlogging only entails ASL, but indeed! Some of us learned ASL as small children at a residential school. We were not "formally taught" in college or elsewhere, forcing our ASL to be smoothe and beautiful (and without much personality). Many of us are Native Signers and without all of the fancy "footwork" that is forced on us today.

Awhile back I had cataract surgery along with a very welcome ASL Interpreter. The first thing she asked me was, "ASl" or "English". This was a brand new dilemma to me, because I had worked at a residential school for many, many years and had EVERY kind of sign language there is crammed down my throat, with "Use it or else!" But I responded to her with "ASL" and we got along just fine. 'Except for one thing. My interpreter was a young black woman, and I did not know the latest politically correct sign for "Black". Luckily she understood, but I was left feeling embarassed and sad at the crumbling of the ASL that I was raised with.

So that is my thought for today. 'Sorry if I was rambling, but from watching the news on T.V. I suspect that I am not the only one!

Respectfully, Lantana

My First Full Body Massage!

2008-01-13T18:42:00.000-08:00

'Not particularly a hearing impaired/deaf/Deaf issue, there is a link here that might make sense to alot of deaf folks. I hope.

I live mainly in a hearing world. My kids are all hearing, as is my DH. I have an "affliction" that many of you may or may not recognize: A sore neck!

Even if you only speak ASL and nothing else, you STILL have to move your head! Our upper mechanicism is in constant motion, our heads swiveling in all directions, almost 24/7. You feel a vibration, great, but your head and neck swivel to find where it come from. Your friend, (deaf or hearing!) taps you on the shoulder, inviting communication. Another head/neck workout. Lights flashing or blinking? No matter if it is a planned event, due to your purchased system that let's you know if and when your phone, doorbell, baby is making a racket. You still have to turn your head! 'While your poor neck takes the beating. ~~Sigh ~~ !

We all are aware of the "busy neck syndrome". :(

So I decided to do something about the pain. They tell me nowdays that there is "No Excuse" for putting up with pain. All the magazines tell you that! Medical Miracles, right? So off I went to a local massage therapist, after a kindly friend called and made me an appointment.

My first impression that there was "nothing in writing". The gal, (who was nice enough), keyed me in to signals to let her know if she was "hitting me too hard". "Less or more", right? She was aware of my right knee replacement and that I was deaf, that's about it. I also informed her that this was my first massage therapy EVER, and that this year, I will be 75 years old! Not even a blink out of her! "Wow, 75, never would have guessed it". And so on. (Always good for a tip later).

After I was laid out to rest on the table like fresh meat, she was kind enough to kneel so that we could communicate without much problem. Our signals were, "a little bit" and "more". Simple enough. Keep in mind that your face is buried the whole time into a stirrup (for your face, not for your legs).

Okay, this was an HOUR LONG EVENT. I am no chicken, so I went for broke! My tolerance for pain is very, very good, so I was meek and accepting. 'Only once did I call a halt, when my right arm when completely numb!

Ahhh, well, that was quite a workout!! My husband was upset the next day because my back was entirely black and blue. I remained in bed until almost NOON, to make sure that everything "still worked". I had hot pads, cold pads, and Robaxin to relax my muscles.

That was 3 days ago. Today I can happily share with you that I am "almost" back to "normal "(whatever that is), and that I can swivel my neck without intense pain. I am still black and blue,but thinking positive and looking forward to the day when I will have "follow up" massage therapy!

This ain't for wimps!

Oil Change Syndrome

2008-01-01T14:16:00.000-08:00

Oh no! DH says it is time for an oil change! I knew that subject was coming up and I always dread it and put this painful chore off as long as possible! "It's way past due" says DH frowning crossly as if the world might soon be coming to an end.

' Ask any woman! And for a deaf women it is even more hectic. I'd rather have a root canal!

These guys with cute hats and coveralls come out of the building with a huge smile, a newspaper, a clipboard and "mumble, mumble, mumble~~~~~~. Me: "I am sorry, I am deaf, I have to read your lips. I just want an oil change, please". The guy throws me an uncomfortable look and get's to work. Soon he returns with his clipboard frowning and wearing a painful expression on his face ~~~~~~~scary, huh? "Mumble, mumble,mumble" and he proceeds to point out with his pen all of these extra, mysterious services that need to be done to my car, PLUS the oil change. That's when I start getting sick to my stomach and cursing my husband privately for not bringing the car himself!

"I just want an oil change please!!" And I deliberately turn my head away, shame on me for "using" my deafness! The fellow looks hurt and worried and I am positive my car is going to fall apart before I clear the driveway!

Yesterday I timidly told the man that I thought I needed new rubber blades for my windshield wipers. And I showed him the funny marks that they leave on my windshield. "NO Problem Ma'am!" And he gets busy once again. My stomach starts contorting again, I smell a rat! So I ask him "How much??" And he replied, "Thirty dollars!"

"Put the old ones back on!" I tell him. Growl.

So I go home with my bitter story and you know what? Dear Hubby patted me on the head and told me I did a good job!

What about my nerves??!

Sick and Tired of Cranberries??

2007-12-23T15:11:00.000-08:00

By now or at least by the end of this week, perhaps some of you are a little bored with cranberry sauce on your left over turkey? I have a good solution!

Grapefruit & Celery Jello Salad (an old, old standby, we love it!)

1 pkg lime jello, prepared as usual
1 can of grapefruit sections
3 or 4 celery stalks chopped in your food processor

While the Jello is setting in your fridge, drain the grapefruit and throw the chopped celery onto the grapefruit to let all of them drain together. When the Jello is starting to thicken, add the drained grapefruit sections and celery. Mix well and leave in your fridge until set. I learned from my mother in law long ago that if you add about 1/2 tsp of rice vinegar to the Jello water it gives it a nice flavor. I know this recipe sounds toooo simple to be any good, but it is delicious! Also very good when serving fish. Enjoy! :)

Joyous Holiday Season

2007-12-23T12:16:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays to my Internet Family. Thanks for the great ride!

From Lantana and family.

Another Gooood Recipe For Special Occasions

2007-12-17T12:01:00.000-08:00

It is nice to have a "Trifle Bowl" for this recipe. You can get them at Target for around $20.00, or watch for them at a garage sale. This is a beautiful recipe and very impressive, especially if you use a trifle bowl!

Low Fat Cherry Angel Pudding/salad/snack

1 (14 oz) can Eagle Brand Low Fat Sweetened Condensed Milk (NOT "evaporated milk").

1 C. cold water

1 (4-serving size) Instant Vanilla pudding mix

1 (9 oz) prepared angel food cake, cut in small cubes (about 6 cups)

1 (8 oz) container non-fat plain yogurt

2 (1.3 oz) whipped topping mix, whipped as package directs, subsituting almond extract for the vanilla.

1 (21 oz) can cherry pie filling, chilled

In bowl, combine Eagle Brand and water. Add pudding mix, beat until well blended. Chill 15 minutes. Stir in yogurt. Fold in whipped topping. Spoon 1/3 pudding mixture into large glass serving bowl. Top with half of the cake cubes and cherry pie filling. Repeat layering, ending with pudding mixture. Chill throughly. Keep left overs refrigerated.

300 calories per serving. Fat: 3g

What Did I Expect?

2007-12-16T18:25:00.000-08:00

Because of my stepson's premature death (he was my husband's only child) it became necessary for us to go and make out new Wills.

Everyone (*not* excluding lawyers!) is kind of backwoods around here, and I keep busy setting everyone straight about how to treat a disabled person. Of course I strike out occasionally, and I just did again!

Imagine my surprise when we got our bill from our lawyer and I noticed a $40.00 fee for an ASL Interpreter. I had sat through several sessions WITHOUT an interpreter, but felt very uncomfortable so finally demanded one. And got docked for it!

Psssst. I won't complain that the lawyer's bill was over $3,000.00! We paid of course, but I made a note on the bill, "What happened to the ADA Law??"

What do lawyers do when they make mistakes?? Apolgize? Cop out? Send you a gift card? Or pretend that it didn't happen,(just because they are lawyers). :(

Tis The Season

2007-12-16T16:00:00.000-08:00

We women enjoy Mountain Mama so much that I thought that perhaps I should share a few recipes of my own that I have accumiliated over 50 years. Being that it is the holiday season I will just mention recipes that are appropriate for the holidays or perhaps another special occasion.

Tired of turkey, so doing a ham this year?

RAISIN SAUCE FOR HAM

3/4 cup sugar

1 TB cornstarch

1 tsp cloves

2 TB vinegar (I use rice vinegar)

1 TB butter

1 cup raisins

Mix all together and boil gently until thickened. Serve in an attractive gravy boat with a small ladle.

STUFFED DATES

Purchase larger dates (found in the produce section in your market)

Remove seed or buy the pitted variety.

Fill with cream cheese and a chunk of walnut. Close.

Roll in powdered sugar. Serve on attractive candy dish.

PRETZEL SALAD (or can be served as a desert)

3/4 cup margarine

2 C. crushed pretzels

1 (6oz) pkg strawberry Jello

2 (10 oz sizes) frozen strawberries (partially thawed)

1 (8 oz) cream cheese, 1/2 C. sugar

1 (12 oz) Cool Whip

3 TB sugar

1 C. nuts

1 - 1/2 C. boiling water

Mix Margarine, pretzels, sugar and nuts together and bake in a 9x13 in. pan for 8 minutes at 400 degrees. Cool.

Mix Jello and water. Coolslightly, and add berries. Let stand until slightly thickened.

Mix cream cheese, sugar and Cool Whip and spread mixture over pretzels. Pour slightly thickened berries over cheese mixture. Place in fridge until firm and ready to serve.

*You can also use frozen raspberries and raspberry Jello instead of strawberries.

EXTREMELY good and worth the effort!

I have many, many favorite recipes and will share them occasionally if there is a call for them

Happy Holidaze everyone!

Lantana

The Usual Hospital Quagmire

2007-11-12T15:18:00.000-08:00

I was thrilled when a friend from the east coast recently informed me that she had the use of a video phone during a recent stay in the hospital in her area. 'Thanks to a very large deaf population in the east, our deaf friends, family and acquaintances there are fortunate to have such up to date technology.

But I live in the "toolies". I recently found it necessary to take my husband to Emergency at our local hospital. After several days of heart attack symtoms, we finally made the trek that we had been dreading. Our hospital, fairly new, is high on a hill overlooking our little beach town and with a glimpse of the ocean and a grand view of both the sunrise and sunset. It it sits high enough so that if the big tsunami does come, the hospital will be safe from harm. 'Extremely intelligent planning.

My husband had been in the hospital there before, so there was no paperwork to be done. We have excellent insurance, with the same company for over 40 years. And of course, Medicare. The Emergency staff hooked him up to all of the appropriate machines, IV's, beepers and so on. They worked smoothely and precisely. I had utmost confidence in these people.

But where was the COURTESY? I sat in a chair in the Emergency room with my husband holding his coat, billfold, etc. for several hours. I did not receive even a glance from the nurses or the interne on duty even tho I sat only a foot away from my husband's bed. Once they realized that I was deaf, I got the cold, fisheye stare, that was all. I got up a couple of times to "thaw out" my knee replacement, which can become stiff from constant sitting. The nurse caught my husband's attention and ordered, "Will you tell her to sit down?!!?" I was not standing up in my husband's room, I was pacing the hallway. (I felt like telling her to tell me herself!) If I asked what a particular machine was, or what it was for, or just some simple information so I would know what was going on, the nurse and the interne (who was my grandchildrens' age!) didn't bother to acknowledge that I had asked a question. Silence! Nothing! I felt less than sub human.

After the 4th hour, they decided to "keep" my husband and place him in the ICU. So I left for a little while to do some errands and catch a bit of fresh air. The nurses in the ICU were a great deal nicer, some of them even had personalities! I had planned on spending sometime with my husband in his ICU room, but he was busily watching t.v. trying to relax. Guess what? No CC t.v.! My husband is HOH from age and vocation and depends a great deal on captions, (OR) he turns up the sound loud enough to awake the dead.

The next morning, the hospital decided that they had done all they could for the time being and let my husband go, with the understanding that he visit his own doctor the very next day. But my husband had no way to get ahold of me. When he dialed Relay, he could not get past the switchboard. When he asked a young nurse about a tty (how primitive!) she didn't even know what a tty was! This nurse was an RN!

I finally showed up at 11:30 a.m. and we got outa there. I am not sure what to do about all of this, since we are a small town. I did not ask for an interpreter, no special priviledges, nothing except common courtesy and a way to get to my husband via a telephone. Since I was not the patient, I am not sure I would have been provided with an interpreter, anyway. What is the protocol on this? My money is just as good as anyone else's and I CAN PAY. Why treat me so rudely?

Thanks for listening.

Lantana

The KKK Incident And Davila's CNN Interview

2007-10-05T11:39:00.000-07:00

When I first read about the KKK incident at MSSD, I thought to myself, "Well at least this one was not swept under the rug." It was reported, the culprits sent home AND news media got ahold of it, all of which are good.

These kinds of incidents are pretty common in a dormitory setting. WHERE WERE THE ADULTS? Were they punished and sent home too?? I certainly hope so.

I feel badly that CNN chose to interview Davila. He has enough stress with his own job and does not need to borrow trouble. His answers were obviously a cop-out, and I don't blame him. Shame on CNN for not doing their homework.

Let's hope that this dramatic experience puts more spotlights on residential schools. Those kids all should have been living at home with their parents.

Lantana

Possible Over Indulgence = Vascular Disease

2007-09-16T17:53:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been reading a great deal about over indulgence in excercise. And I am wondering if fellow deafies have heard the more recent scuttlebutt concerning excercise and vascular disease.

It is now believed that "less is more" and to use common sense and moderation when planning an excercise program.

My own mother was a prime example. My mom was a very vain lady and my memories are of her excercising steadily, every day, any day, she never missed. Later on when she became a little older she employed an excercise bike, which she rode faithfully. She used barbells and all kinds of gimmicks that she saw advertised on T.V. If it was advertised on late night television, you can be sure my mother had it!

Then there came a time when she had to cut down. The doctor warned her that too much of a good thing can be dangerous. Sure enough one, by one, my mom had to have each of her legs amputated below the knee, due to vascular disease. She did not have diabetes and had always followed a very strict diet, consuming home grown veggies and meat that was raised on the farm. Other than the vascular problem,she was in excellent health.

Moderation is the key.

Lantana

Sigh Not Again!

2007-09-07T20:03:00.000-07:00

My husband and I have been in the middle of making out new Wills. We did have a Will, but it was showing signs of old age and definately not acknowledging the new "laws of the times". When a married couple flies the friendly skies hither and yon, it is comforting to know that if you wind up shark bait, that your estate(s) will be dispersed in a timely and appropriate manner.

First we had to find a lawyer with a license in both Oregon and Washington since we own property in both states. For the first couple of meetings with our lawyer, I did not demand an interpreter, trusting my husband to keep me "informed". Well THIS did not work, and I became very weary of being "invisible". Plus, my husband is very HOH from age, and it appears that I can read lips better than he can HEAR, so at home we went "around and around". Not fun! And very unecessary! (Have I mentioned that I am Irish??!)

I also need to explain that my husband and I are "older" and remarried late in life and both of us have families from prior marriages.

So, my husband called the lawyer's secretary and asked for an ASL interpreter. We live in a small town on the Oregon Coast and interpreters are extremely difficult to come by AND most of them are personal friends! The secretary promised to "look into the matter" and phoned my husband back and forth giving him several telephone numbers, instructing us to call and make the arrangements. My "deaf antennae" went up! Up high! And then higher! I told my husband that it was the lawyer's office's responsibility to find, hire and book (and PAY) the interpreter, not ours and that it should have been done long ago. I reminded him that if we had been immigrants, we would have had an interpreter "pronto"!!

Keep in mind we are dealing with a law office here! What happened to the ADA Law? Where is "it" hiding?? Geeze, Louise! No wonder lawyers have a bad name!

Well, I am happy to tell you that it all turned out okay, tho my Irish temper kept insisting on rising to the occasion. The terp showed up and tho she is a personal friend she is one that I can trust. We all left the meeting feeling satisfied with the results, and everyone exited happy. 'Kind of.

However the terp did make a comment (which I agreed with) that we would most likely be "docked" for her services when we received our final bill for making out the new Will. ~~ Sigh ~~ where are my rights?

Lantana
Lantana's Latitude

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood --Prologue

2007-09-04T18:52:00.000-07:00

I lost my hearing at the end of May, 1943. I was then enrolled in the state residential school in September of the same year and by Christmas my mother noticed a big difference in my voice and with my speech.

I had an uncle by marriage that was very hard of hearing and I maintained a good recollection of what his voice was like, so realized regretfully what was happening to me. A deaf voice "carries" no matter how well you modulate and some people have compared our voices to a fog horn!

Luckily for me, my mother, and then later on my own children, felt comfortable with assisting me with my speech difficulties and if I was unsure how to pronounce something, I was not ashamed to ask for help. While in public school one of the teachers complained to the administration and so I was sent to a speech therapist that was situated across campus in the grade school building. After only one session, I stalked out. It was very obvious to me that this woman knew nothing about the deaf. 'Speech, maybe, but the complexities of DEAF speech were way beyond her. I never went back.

Other than my own children, no one in my family learned to Sign. Not even fingerspelling. I do not recall resenting this slight and I turned into a skilled lipreader. I can and do socialize with both hearing and deaf persons equally well. And I feel doubly blessed.

My family did not Sign but my hearing friends did! To this day, my girlfriends that I ran around with in public school sign to me. I was a student of Drivers Ed but the instructor decided not to pass me because he thought I needed more experience than the average teenager. I felt badly when all of my buddies and fellow Drivers Ed students received their licenses, but I understood the theory behind the instructor's decision and accepted it.

I will not pretend that I do not miss my hearing. When my husband is listening to his Boze, I feel a little envious, but he always tells me what he is listening to, and even my parrot, Lenny sways to a mean tune! His favorite is old fashioned "Bop". When a clerk in a store gives me a bad time or when someone turns around and stares when they hear my deaf voice, I briefly think about how satisfying it would be to punch them in the nose, but so far I have resisted the temptation!

I have surrounded myself with what I consider beauty. I inherited my father's love of the land and have a mean green thumb. I even grow orchids in our bathroom grow window. My flowers are my music.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Suppose, my little lady, Your doll should break her head;

Could you make it whole by crying

Til your eyes and nose were red?

And wouldn't it be pleasanter

To treat it as a joke,

And say you're glad 'twas dolly's

And not your own that broke?

Suppose your task, my little man,

Is very hard to get;

Will it make it any easier

For you to sit and fret?

And wouldn't it be wiser,

Than waiting like a dunce,

To go to work in earnest

And learn the thing at once?

Suppose the world don't please you,

Nor the way some people do;

Do you think the whole creation

Will be altered just for you?

And isn't it, my boy or girl,

The wisest, bravest plan,

Whatever comes, or doesn't come,

To do the best you can?

*Borrowed from "Suppose" by Phoebe Cary

I cried because I had no shoes til I met a man who had no feet.

Lantana, September 4, 2007

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 9

2007-09-01T19:30:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends, I took time out to go to our farm and pick string beans from our garden and give the whole shebang a little TLC. We are also over burdened with zukes and lemon cucumbers! It looks like it will be a good tomato year. I hope you all are having a pleasant holiday weekend.

``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Part 9, Going Deaf In Middle Childhood:

Soon after I became deaf, our dentist told my family stories about his experiences in the South Pacific while he was in the Medical Corps there. This was right after World War Two had broken out and there was a great deal of experimentation at that time with new "wonder drugs" that were being developed and and then later tested on the inhabitants of these islands. Our dentist claimed that there were many, many South Pacific natives who became "deaf as posts" as a result of these unproven new drugs. One of these new "potions" was Sulfa.

So, I must have been one of the first children devasted by so called wonder drugs. Dr. Skinner was a good man and used all of his skills to save my life. There were no hard feelings, even tho my parents' friends kept whispering, "Sue him!" How can you sue someone that saved your child's life?

So back in those days, the 40's state run deaf schools were not equipped to handle youngsters such as me. I was a new generation of Deaf. My fellow students looked upon me as some kind of a curiosity and for a long time I was an outsider living side by side with children who were culturally deaf, some of them with several generations of deaf ancestors behind them.

Time seemed to pass swiftly and I adjusted, still very much surviving as a square peg being pounded into a round hole. I made friends, and enjoyed having classmates go home to the farm with me on a weekend occasionally. Once I recall spending a weekend in Seattle with one of my classmates who resided there with her parents. My own parents frequently came to school during the week to attend basketball games and give me an encouraging pat on the back. This was one of the benefits of having a family living in the same town as the school.

After four years the school had taught us everything it had to offer. My classmates and I were ready to "graduate". I was 14 years old, my oldest classmate was 21. A year before we were to leave our "home away from home" many deaf acquaintances, the deaf teachers, and some staff began pestering me about attending Gallaudet College. At the tender age of 14, I was not interested in doing anything like that, I was still very much a teenie bopper! And hadn't I just spent the last 4 years of my life living away from my family? No way! Gallaudet was not on my list of priorities for the future. I refused to take The Test.

Less than half of my class from the state school went on to Gallaudet. The ones who did NOT became otherwise self supporting in many different vocations and all of them worked hard until retirement. One of the Gallaudet graduates married and she returned to Washington State with her new husband to teach at the same school we graduated from.

For myself, I went on to finish my education in the public school system, without such conveniences as interpreters and/or note takers, but happily living at home with my parents and two brothers. With the DVR's help, I later on attended a local Business College.

I went on to marry and have five children, all of whom turned out to be high achievers. My oldest son, who bore most of the brunt of having a deaf Mom while Dad traveled, is now a CPA and is Chief Financial Manager of a large school district in Washington State. Because of their extremely precise speech, all 5 of my children are called upon to make speeches. My youngest son, interestingly, graduated from Radio Broadcasting School.

After most of my children were out of the house, at the urging of my deaf mother in law, I returned to the state residential school as staff. There I remained for 25 years until retirement. I was well educated by the school during these 25 years, taking all classes that were offered and attending workshops regularly. We received college credits for all of the classes that we took. There is however nothing that can equal experience (and/or common sense).

During my later working years, I usually juggled 2 or 3 jobs. These included moonlighting as a Sign Language instructor for the local community college and working in a group home for emotionally disturbed deaf adults. The group home also offered workshops and training, mostly in the mental health field, which I throughly enjoyed. I love learning what makes people tick!

The next and final chapter, part 10, will be a prologue to my story here.

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 8

2007-08-28T08:45:00.000-07:00

No tale of a residential school childhood would be complete without the mention of the school dining room! Everyone loves to chow down and the deaf with their incredibly sharp taste buds are eager eaters.

Like I mentioned before, the dining room had a central location in the middle of the campus with doors leading out to each side, one direction for the boys and in the opposite direction for the girls. From the time I was a student of the school until the time I retired as Staff, I saw many, many changes in that building and the way it was run. Not all of the changes were for the better.

At first the dining room was run "family style". There were large, square wooden tables that held 8 people. At one corner sat a "father" (an older student) and opposite on another corner was a "mother". These tables were covered with crisp white table cloths and we had white cotton napkins to match with "napkin rings" to show "ownership" of our own personal napkin. The cloths and the napkins were changed twice a week, washed and ironed in the school laundry. I distinctly recall some of us, who wore lipstick would put a "kiss" on our napkin to prove ownership! Anyone recall "Pink Lightening" lipstick??

If we put our elbows on the table, they got slammed with a table knife by the table "father". We were required to dress nicely, no shorts or "inappropriate" sportswear. Grace was said before each meal while we were still standing beside our tables. Dorm staff would flash the lights, and when EVERYONE was quiet a previously chosen student would say grace. Often (understandably) there was a long wait before everything was quiet, and if YOU were the one holding the meal up, all eyes would be shooting daggers at you.

We were served family style with large bowls of food served by "waitresses and waiters", who were also students. These hard working (and often verbally abused) kids wore starched, white cotton aprons. All of we residential school graduates are familiar with the sign "Lousy Food!" But actually the victuals were quite good and we had 3 very well balanced meals a day including deserts. We were expected to "try a little of everything" and the table "parents" would make sure that you followed this protocol! It was an absolute requirement that we attend each and every meal. No one got left behind and if you were missed, someone would come after you.

After each meal the tables were cleaned off and reset for the next meal by yes, you guessed it, students! We all learned to WORK at an early age.

Later on after I became a staff member, the dining room was changed into cafeteria style. Even later, the lines in the cafeteria were no longer segregated by sex, no more "boys in one line and girls in another. And prayer was abolished. Students could wear shorts, thongs, etc. No more dress code in the dining room. And with the loss of family style dining, prayer and a dress code, good behavior (and manners) went out the window!

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 7

2007-08-27T10:44:00.000-07:00

The years passed swiftly. In December of 1944 my parents gifted my brother and I with a brand new baby brother. Perhaps this new offspring made up for the hole I created in the family unit when I was away at school (in those days the term "Whoops Baby" had yet to be created).

Since the deaf students were not allowed to go home every weekend, the staff found it necessary to keep us busy and out of mischief while out of the class room. I recall a "Merry Makers Club" that threw holiday parties and long hikes in the woods on Sunday afternoons. We explored the wooded countryside, which has now become home sites for multimillion dollar view homes. I recall being happy on weekends at school, throughly enjoying my friends who shared a burdening disability with me.

"The ties that bind". Those of us who attended a State School For The Deaf formed a deep bond that would last a lifetime. It is a bond that only growing up together in close quarters, sharing good and bad times, laughter and tears, and more than a few quarrels (and occasionally a good fist fight) can create. We were true sisters in almost every sense. To this day we crack up over pranks that we played back then, the "underground" that we created to avoid strict dormitory staff, and some of the sometimes cruel but comical travesties we used on one another.

To this day, I am still warm friends with "Betty" the little girl who sat next to me at assembly in the chapel on the first day of school. We talk often on the V.P. and catch up on the gossip and the health problems of those "sisters and brothers" that we attended school with. We never dreamed so long ago that we would be able to chat with one another via a video, nor did we expect anything so fantastic as closed cpationed t.v. and a Relay Service that made it possible for us to make our own doctor and hair appointments! Betty and I will always be ten years old, sitting next to one another in excited anticipation of a whole new way of life opening up to us that day.

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 6

2007-08-26T15:05:00.001-07:00

When reading over my blog I can see that probably evening is not the best time for me to be writing. This time I will try it in the afternoon when my mind is more clear and not fogged from a busy, active day! Thanks to everyone for being patient with me.

There have been many thousands of words written hashing over the pros and cons of residential living for the deaf. 'Not only written words but mountains of scuttlebutt. I can say truthfully here that WHILE A STUDENT MYSELF, I never once saw or heard of anything untoward happening at my paricular school. About the worst thing I can recall is seeing a couple separated while riding the football bus for becoming a little too chummy!

I began the scholastic part of my education at the State School For The Deaf as a 10 year old in a room with other deaf students, all of whom were quite a few years older than I, most of them teenagers. I would have entered the 5th grade in public school, had I not become deaf, and that is what we were doing here, 5th grade work. I had 3 deaf teachers and one hearing teacher. The hearing teacher was skilled in Sign Language. (Even tho I was not!) We had a HOH gymnastics instructor that we all loved and admired, a beautiful lady who worked us hard. We were taught to march professionally, to tumble on mats and even to tap dance. I can even recall us gathering around a piano with our hands flat on it's top to pick up vibrations and being encouraged to sing! One of the deaf instructors, Mr. Hunter had gone deaf late in childhood himself, so he understood what I was going through, and sometimes he and I would share little jokes that would have gone completely over another deaf person's head.

My social education was a different story. For some reason I was never enightened on why the deaf have "messed up English". The girls tried to write to me on the dorm blackboard, but alot of what they said appeared to be almost gibberish to me. Pig Latin! It took me many years to figure it all out and learning sign language helped me understand more than anything anyone could have told me.

Our bedrooms were assigned to us according to our grade in school without considering age, so I was lumped together much too soon with hormonal teenagers. I attended teenage parties, went to football and basketball games while other students my age had to stay behind. I was told that my dresses were too short, my mouth too wide and that I needed a bra, long before I had anything to put into one!

My mother had always been a meticulous housekeeper, but SHE did the work! In the dorm in those days THERE WERE NO JANITORS. The students did all the chores, mopping floors, dusting, scrubbing bathroom basins, etc. And we girls also (in addition) had a "little sister" that we were expected to help dress and groom each morning. The early morning hours were frantic in the dormitory. I learned to sweat. At recess we would huddle in front of the bulletin board to take in the list of all the "poor housekeepers". And whomever was on that list had to re-do the whole job after lunch. I recall the mops were very, very heavy, the buckets full of water on wheels would tip over if you did not scoot them just right. Your bucket tipping over was no excuse for being late for school. And if your mop "turned sour" that meant you did not use enough bleach!

Once a week after school if we had been good, the dorm mother would unlock the candy cupboard and we would receive our weekly treat. If you hadn't "earned" your treat, the dorm mother would repeat in every revealing detail, in front of the whole group, WHY we could not have our candy that week.

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 5

2007-08-24T17:40:00.000-07:00

The State School For The Deaf is situated on a bluff high above the Columbia River on some of the most prime real estate property in the county, perhaps in the whole state. It began it's life in a huge Gothic building dubbed The State School For Defective Youth.

By the time I arrived there it had become a deaf school and the grounds were a mish mash of various period buildings. Most were of red brick, a few of lighter brick and in the middle of the large, pleasantly green campus was the cafeteria. The school marked it's prominence with a huge red brick smokestack that reached high into the clouds.

I do not recall visiting the school beforehand, and it was summertime, anyway, no one was there. My first inkling that I was being forced to leave my warm, secure childhood home was when my mother ordered name tags that were soon sewed neatly onto each item of my clothing. Somehow my mother had secured a list of the clothing that I was required to have to be a student of a residential school. "Five of this, ten of that, one dozen of these" and so on. I think I had just become an expensive liability.

Even tho the State School For The Deaf was in the same town where my family and I resided, the school protocol required that students could only go home every OTHER weekend. The superintendent felt that the children had a better chance of adjusting to being away from home this way.

So I was dropped off into a new and frightening place, not to see my family again for two whole weeks. I recall nothing of arriving in the dorm, unpacking, putting my clothes away and being issued a bed, towels etc. My subconcious has this part of my story stored somewhere in the dark recesses of my mind, perhaps where I will never, ever conciously have to think of it again.

I DO recall the first day of school and assembly in the "Chapel". The chapel was a dual duty room with a small stage and spotless hardwood floors that smelled of some kind of cleaning oil. I found myself sitting with other restless little girls my own age who resided in my part of the dormitory. On this day, I was sitting next to Betty, who was also a new girl. We thought for sure that we would be in a class together, and despite my lack of sign language, we both communicated that we were excited about sharing a grade and a teacher.

One by one the different teachers showed up smiling and selected the students that would be in their respective classes. Betty was chosen and left. No one came after me. Eventually I was called up and placed in a group of young teenagers, all of whom were at least 3 or 4 years older than I was. I knew no sign language, I had no idea what was going on. I was only 10 years old, perhaps someone had made a big mistake? My heart pounded with surprise and fear. What was happening here?

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood, Part 4

2007-08-23T19:20:00.000-07:00

When I awoke from my long and treacherous coma and found my mother writing to me on our little blackboard with chalk I lacked just 10 weeks of being 10 years old. I had just completed the 4th grade. I was still very much a little girl.

My mother continued to scribble quick messages, "Are you hungry?" "Do you feel like getting up"? "Grandma is here, do you feel like chatting with her"? And ALWAYS, "Can you hear me YET??" The answer to the later question was always, "No".

My own reaction? I cannot recall any! Later on when I asked Mom how she knew that she had to write to me instead of speaking verbally she replied that I kept telling them that I could not hear, over and over and over again while I was in the coma. Somewhere in my subconcious mind I had accepted this fact and did not feel the need to ask any questions to appease any curiosity. 'Strange how the mind works.

Dr. Skinner had only 3 words of advice. "Never, never allow her to ride a bicycle, and send her to the State School For The Deaf." AND of course since he did not know for sure what had caused my deafness, he told us to keep me away from Sulfa. I might be allergic to it and if it was used on me again, who knows what harm it might do next?

But first, I had to LEARN TO WALK. I had been ill for a very long time. My inner ear had a great deal of damage. I was terribly weak and then there were those horrible noises in my ears! Crickets, frogs croaking, screeching violins, you name any roaring, obnoxious sound, and I had it.

I went deaf during the last week of May, Memorial Day 1943. My mother spent that summer dragging me from doctor to doctor hoping to find a "cure. " Of course these practitioners were more than willing to take her money when they knew darned good and well that nothing could be done. Looking back, it was very sad for my mother, but her kindly and caring gesture did give her some peace of mind, knowing that what she was doing was right. My mother felt guilty to her dying day for sending me back to school too early.

Gradually life returned to some resemblance of normal. My brother and I share an August birthday and this time the family gathered at our farm to celebrate. "Grandmas, grandpas, aunts, uncles, cousins! Food! Laughter and merry making. What great fun to be back in circulation again! The day went normally until the evening when my grandpa started playing his fiddle. Everyone was stomping and yelling and singing to his lively tunes. I had been raised to the sound of my grandpa's fiddle.

I escaped into our only bathroom and locked the door.

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood, Part 3

2007-08-22T20:20:00.000-07:00

Our mother,while a wonderful,kind and caring woman did not react well to illness. She had lost a sister to kidney disease when the sister was just 15 years old and I have always felt that this trumatic childhood experience left her feeling helpless around anyone who was unwell. Any major medical crisis knocked my mom for a loop.

My brother, who is 4 years younger than I, must have been in kindergarten. I do not remember those little details, I do recall that there was a very long incubation period before I came down with them myself. In those days diseases did not have a "nationality". They were just mumps, chicken pox, or measles (or a snotty nose). Except for Small Pox, there were no inoculations. We jumped into all of our medical emergencies cold turkey, expecting only to get well and hurry back into circulation. I recall as a child that there were many nights when I was put to bed with a hot water bottle, which was soooo comforting and was supposed to solve "whatever ailed you" overnight.

I got through the measles seemingly okay and was returned to school, where I promptly passed out. My parents came and took me home of course, and from then on for about 2 weeks I remember very little. My dad was still a farmer, my mother not yet working for Nabisco, there was no money for medical emergencies. I fell into a deep coma and after time passed my parents started searching for a doctor who would come to the house. The only one they could find left in the middle of a high school graduation ceremony to come and tend to me.

This was in 1943. There were new wonder drugs coming onto the market every day. This doctor, his name was Dr. Skinner, decided to use Sulfa to try and save my life. Sulfa was brand new at the time and the proper dosages probably had not yet been created . But Dr. Skinner, with his coke bottle glasses took his job seriously.

The last thing I remember hearing was my brother asking my mother if I was going to die.

And I awoke much later to my mother writing messages to me with white chalk on our toy blackboard.

To be continued

The Original Farmers Daughter, Part 2

2007-08-21T19:29:00.000-07:00

So we became farmers. This was my dad's big dream. He had quit school very early, around the 8th grade to go to work and help out his struggling family. Back in those days, getting a job did not require a great deal of protocol, if you were good at what you did, you got the job! Schooling and education were the least of anyone's worries. My dad was highly intelligent and very mechanically inclined. The mechanical part came in handy as a farmer, since SOMETHING was always broken down!

My brothers and I always had interesting pets on the farm. There was the goat, Heidi, who spent a great deal of time on top of the chicken house munching on the huge Gravenstein apples off of the tree that grew out of the chicken yard. 'No need to pay for expensive fertilizer! We had a real Collie, just like Lassie. There were cats of course, but they were "barn cats" and very wild and came close to us only at milking time when they lined up next to "the gutter" begging for a squirt of milk.

Then there were the rabbits. My brother and I used to get the big buck out of his cage and throw him in with the female, just to see all the funny, amusing things that they did there. What fantastic entertainment! We had no clue as to what was happening in that cage, and since we always put the buck back where he belonged, I am sure my dad scratched his head for a long time over where all the baby bunnies came from!

My dad butchered the young rabbits. He hung them from the ceiling in the basement and skinned them and we often had rabbit for dinner. I do not recall what happened to the skins. I no longer eat rabbit, ugh.

We had our own chickens and butchering chickens was just another day on the farm. The big block of wood, the hatchet, and the chicken flopping headless all over the yard. We didn't think anything of it. It was our way of life. I can still remember the smell of the wet feathers after my dad dunked the chicken in boiling water to ensure that the feathers come off easily. Phew! We always saved the old,old hens for boiling for stew. It took all day to get them tender enough for chicken and noodles. Nowdays you boil a chicken for an hour and you wind up with wallpaper paste!

My mother never planned to be a farmer's wife. She did not care for all of the hard work and eventually she got a job away from home at Nabisco where she remained until retirement. Her job provided us with many extras that a farmer's wage could not offer us.

My brother and I climbed onto the big yellow school bus each morning for the ride to the grade school several miles away. 'A medium sized red brick building with no cafeteria, we all took our lunches and ate at our wooden desks in our respective classrooms. I recall that the room always smelled of overripe banannas and rubber boots.

When you go to school and mix with other children, there are always the childhood ailments lurking in the background. We had the usual, chicken pox, mumps, the occasional runny noses, nothing serious or threatening -- and then my brother brought home the measles!

To be continued

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood

2007-08-20T14:18:00.000-07:00

We all enjoyed reading LaRonda's story so much, that I thought it would be neat if some of the rest of us shared a little about what happened to US. We had to finish out our childhoods with the "hearing on the forehead" Sign, which in itself makes us "different".

I will not attempt to write everything in one installment, because I know that important tidbits will keep popping back into my head as I go along. I am not trying to compete with anyone else's blog or their own special story. "I yam what I yam" (Thanks Popeye).

Part One: "The OriginalFarmer's Daughter" ! Yes, I was raised on an All Jersey Dairy. I was actually born in South Central L.A., Huntington Park, when that city was already beginning to show shades of becoming intolerable, so my Dad moved us, bag and baggage to Washington State where he was originally from. We eventually purchased our Dairy Farm and all 3 of us kids had a hand in running the business. My two brothers usually got burdened with the dirty work, and I, as a female got to feed the new calves and do "light duty". I always preferred working outside, over helping my mother sweat over canning jars in the kitchen. I still hold that trait today. 'Interesting that both of my brothers chose professions where they would work INSIDE. I wonder why?!

My family is from a long line of Irishers. (How did you guess?!) My maternal grandfather was a railroad man who moved frequently with his large family in tow, and my paternal grandfather settled in Port Angeles, Washington where he helped build the city. My happiest memories are of visiting my grandparents in Port Angeles and the unforgetable aroma of the many sawmills in the area at that time. My maternal grandparents lived in San Bernardino, Ca. and my memories of that town are of constant train whistles blowing. To this day, the smell of coal oil reminds me of my grandpa.

To be continued

The Gestapo

2007-08-19T15:48:00.000-07:00

This morning I got busted by Sorenson.

A couple of weeks ago I was notified that the Sorenson rep would be here "Sunday morning" on August 19th. Then more recently I was contacted and told to be ready at 9:00 a.m. with phone numbers of the hearing people that I call. ' 9:00 a.m. on a Sunday morning!? Hello? We finally compromised on 10:00 a.m. ~Sigh~

Yep you guessed it, I have to start using VRS. I just never got around to it before, I am like a cat and wary of big changes, so I just kept on using what I was used to. I admit that I do like VRS much better than anything else I have tried. My daughter tells me that it is a welcome change to be able to leave out the "Ga and SK".

But 9:00 a.m. on a Sunday? I don't even wear a bra until at least Noon! And who am I going to dig out of bed on a Sunday morning to use for a lab rat?? Thankfully my daughter answered the phone in a good mood and did not hate me for interrupting her beauty sleep.

Lantana (who is going to bed early tonight!)

A Little of Everything

2007-08-18T19:11:00.000-07:00

Whew, summer is getting right along and I have to admit that I am looking forward to the winter months so I can recuperate! When you live at the beach like I do, your grandkids seem to grow roots in the sand! My youngest grand daughter is now 11, so I can look forward to them ALL GROWING UP and realizing that sand is supposed to stay outside.

I took my grandkids home and spent a few days in the city. One very interesting thing I did was visit Chestnut Lane, the assisted living facility for the deaf, and deaf/blind in Gresham, Oregon. It was my very first visit and I am NOT familiar with Portland, so I sweated a few bullets just getting there.

I was very, very impressed with the whole place. I enjoyed the friendly, smiling staff (one of which used to be a student of mine!). Everyone appeared happy and contented. One thing I noted is that life moves more slowly there. Even the elevator takes forever, (it seems) because of the wheelchairs and the walkers moving in and out. I finally asked where the STAIRS were because I became bored with waiting. I did not attend a meal, I chose to take my friend out for Chinese. I learned a great deal that day, including how to fold up a wheelchair and put it in the back of my car, etc. Man, those critters are heavy! I must be in good shape! My Subaru Forester came in handy, as did the leather seats for sliding in and out! It was a great day and I hope to return, perhaps next time with the help of The Max so that I do not have to swallow other drivers' insults! (Not that I am above returning my own).

Mark, I enjoyed myself with you and hope we can repeat the day over and over again and soon! You look great, and Chestnut Lane needs you!

On another note. I have had deaf people complain to me about being "locked out" of their motel rooms. It has happened to me and it is not a fun activity to have to go up to the desk and try to make yourself understood that you are unable to get into a room that you paid so much money for! Well, this time I lucked out and got a clerk who EXPLAINED. She told me that our cell phones (with text) ERASES OUR ROOM KEYS. So the next time you go to a hotel, keep your room key away from your text phone! Do not put them both in your purse or your pocket together. They do not get along!

Lantana

Still Kicking!

2007-07-30T09:52:00.000-07:00

'Long time! I was waiting to find a subject that I could sink my teeth into, but have been too busy with my veggies, my flowers and cleaning up the mess after we had the outside of our home professionally painted. 'Great job but what a mess! When the painter scraped the old paint off, our coastal winds blew the chips hither and yon, so we are not the most popular people in our neighborhood right now!

I am waiting for LaRonda's posts on how she lost her hearing to be completed. I think stories about how we became deaf will be interesting fodder to most of us, but do not want to compete with anyone! All of our stories are unique, to be sure. There is room for all of us.

I worked with LaRonda at WSD and I have to mention that she has done a wonderful job of rehabing herself. Such a bright, cheerful woman but definitely not a Pollyanna.

I hope you all are enjoying your summer. Fall is our best season here, summers are usually pretty windy and I am usually outside rescuing my Lupines!

Lantana

"D"eaf jokes vs "d"eaf jokes, Idioms, etc

2007-05-31T16:11:00.000-07:00

For quite a few years we had a hearing superintendent at our residential school that was clueless about telling jokes to the deaf. I recall at one assembly he told a joke and the hearing teachers laughed politely but the deaf staff just sat there looking puzzled. A "hearing" joke can really fall flat in a deaf crowd! (And a "deaf joke" can go right over a hearing person's head).

When I was a kid riding in the back seat of the car, going to Grandma's I recall my dad reading the Burma Shave signs to us before we were able to read. I love Burma Shave type jokes to this day!

This is a small town where I live now and many of the businesses are privately owned, not many franchise's here. And they have given their businesses some really quirky names: In Tillamook there is a radiator shop that advertises on their truck, "The Best Place In Town To Take A Leak".

A tree pruning service here is called, "The Tree Musketeers".

There is a septic tank service called "The Honeywagon". 'An expresso stand called, "The Jitters".

The above are just a few examples of what some deaf might have a problem with. A hearing person just learning about deaf culture needs to be aware of these things.

Lantana

LEST WE FORGET

2007-05-28T16:21:00.000-07:00

Seeing that today is Memorial Day and that Seek Geo has already brought the subject up (awhile back) I think it fitting to discuss a sensitive issue. 'Sensitive to many people, that is.

Geo already has a Last Will and Testament. How unusual for a person so young, but a very good idea. I know many people MY age who have not done this yet. Scary!

I want to share with you my own parents' wishes. My dad just passed away a year ago St. Patricks Day. (Smile, yes we are Irish!). Mom died two years before that. Mom was 94, Dad 93.

They had a large farm on a knoll with a perfect view of Mt. St. Helens. My folks preferred to be cremated and returned to the earth. My mother's ashes were scattered around her rose garden. 'My father's out by the barn and his beloved John Deere equipment shed. Only we children (3 of us) were in attendance. Yes, there was a large memorial service for both of them together at The Elks Club where my dad and my brother were both past Exhaulted Rulers, but the scattering of the ashes with just us three children is what we will always remember.

The farm is all subdivided now, but we like to believe that our parents' spirit still lives on the land.

I wonder how many deaf people realize how important it is to have a will and to leave instructions as to what you want done after you have passed on. Do not leave it to your children to decided.

Respectfully, Lantana
Memorial Day, 2007

LOVE THY NEIGHBOR

2007-05-27T20:25:00.000-07:00

I have never seen anything written by deaf folks about, or concerning their their neighbors. 'Neighbors play a big part in our lives (if we let them) and I can imagine that it is very difficult for most deaf people to be surrounded by hearing neighbors. I know it is for me.

I lived in a condo for 13 years, I had a full time job then, sometimes 2 or 3 jobs at the same time, so all I had to do was "wave" at people I met on the sidewalk or who were getting into their cars. I vaguely connected faces to condo apartment numbers, but it really wasn't important to me at the time. One neighbor loaned me his car so I could go Christmas shopping when my own vehicle was in the shop. That is about as close as I got to anyone. I kicked the HOA President off my doorstep more than once, telling him to come back with an interpreter. 'That sort of thing. He was a jerk, anyway.

Well now I live in a neighborhood! It is nothing new, I have lived here for 15 years, and neighbors have come and gone. Three have died. My husband and I have been included in "block parties" and were even invited to a lavish wedding, reception etc. for a neighbor's daughter. However, I have always felt like I was a 5th wheel, not quite belonging to the program. I am wondering how other deaf people cope with this predicament?

Immediately next door to me, a very nice lady lives with her 90+ year old husband. (People live to a ripe old age here!). She is nice enough and I even took her shopping for groceries when she had a broken leg. However I cannot understand a word she says. She speaks BEHIND her teeth (mostly of which are gold and fascinating to a visual -loving deaf person) and she has all kinds of body language that throws me off. I feel really bad about our whole relationship, but I have no idea how to solve the problem. Mainly I find myself trying to avoid her!

Otherwise I feel that I have control of the situation around here. If people obviously want to be left alone, I accomodate! I certainly know how they feel.

I feel very fortunate that my neighbor "problems" are so skimpy, but the ones I do have I take very seriously.

Lantana

DESPERATELY SEEKING GEO

2007-05-20T17:19:00.000-07:00

Desperately Seeking Geo!

Found him! Right here about four blocks from where I live. He and I and Jes met today at our famous "Bagels By The Sea" here in town. It was wonderful to meet them in person after many weeks of online bantering. ( Geo's blog is one of the few that I have on my desktop. ) He is very much the same person that we view on his vlogs, he has a terrific personality, smiles alot, is very easy to converse with. 'Strange that both he and I felt positive vibes about one another from our bloggings/vloggings online. Jes left for awhile to take pictures of the area and returned when it started to rain. Jes is hearing and is well on his way to an excellent command of ASL. I was impressed.

We three discussed the pros and cons of deaf blogging. We all agreed that blogging is a blessing for our culture and that this is just the beginning. We are hoping that we can all work together so that every deaf person can enjoy this new "creative beginning".

I feel good! The sun just came out and I have just met two terrific young men who have a great deal to offer this world, deaf, HOH, hearing, and human beings in general. High Five to Geo and Jes! Hugs,

Lantana

AND, oh, I did get to see Geo without his hat! What is under that hat is our secret and for you all to find out!

Lantana

Variety Is The Spice Of Life

2007-05-14T21:26:00.000-07:00

Seems like everywhere I go in the deaf world, I hear whining and complaining. "No closed captions!" "No interpreter"! Interpreter Lousy", "Mainstreaming stinks, Residential Schools smell bad", Gallaudet Administration Out of Line, and so on it goes (forever it feels like! ) ....Sigh....

The problem is these days that people think they have all these rights. We are NOT "entitled". The big clue is to be humble, expect nothing. Then you will be pleasantly surprised if you get thrown a few tidbits.

Yeah, I am of a different generation, a very much older generation, but WE did not "expect" anything. We had no interpreters, no closed captions, no tty machines, no Relay Service. 'No ADA Law. We had our babies in the hospital with (luckily) a close relative along to help us through. God help us, if we needed an operation, we went through it cold turkey and expected the best. 'Even if we understood little. If we needed a lawyer, we used pen and paper or a close relative or perhaps one of our children to interpret. A simple phone call? Call in the oldest child. A holiday with an entirely hearing family? Endure it!

So, what is wrong with The Deaf nowdays? You get SOME you want MORE.

Terrorists? Deaf terrorists? I call them whiners!

Lantana

All Things Wise And Wonderful

2007-05-05T14:48:00.000-07:00

I would like to reccomend the following website: www.paperbackswap.com I am one of those weird people who like to read while watching t.v.! I guess it is a survivor thing, since DH likes to watch Speed t.v. and that sort, so I always have a book handy to grab incase the program is really bad! Yes, we have more than one t.v. but we find that we prefer the bedroom t.v. where we can relax.

Reading has always been one of my favorite pastimes. Books saved my sanity when I lost my hearing at age 10 and books have come to my rescue even in social situations where I found myself left out. The sides of a milk carton, the back of cereal boxes, all come in handy for a deaf person!

I often have to pinch myself to make sure I am awake when I am enjoying a good closed captioned movie. We belong to Netflix, their website is amazing! Only once or twice have we received movies that have no captions.

Our latest favorite is The Queen. What a wonderful movie! I felt like I was living the story.

Gardening is another great hobby for a deaf person. I have never been lonely in our veggie garden or working in my flower beds. I have the ability to make all of my plants SMILE. I'll bet many of you did not know that plants smile! My grandchildren learned that from me. A legacy does not need to have monetary value.

"The best things in life are not things"

Vacations To Go

2007-04-26T17:12:00.000-07:00

I have not posted in awhile, I am one of those people who feel that if they have nothing to say, it is best to keep silent.

Keep a woman silent?? Impossible! So here I am again.

At my age, I have been there and done that. 'Had a pickup/camper, been on many cruises, train trips, escorted and unescorted. Etc. Etc.

My impression is that we deafies should PUSH the fact that deaf money is just as good as hearing money!

Example: My husband and I signed up for a Panama Canal Cruise on the Queen Elizabeth 2 many months before the actual trip. I noted that Bill Cosby was the entertainer of choice on that trip, and I did not allow any grass to grow under my feet, writing to the cruise company and asking for an interpreter. I never did hear back, negitive or positive, just NOTHING. No response, period.

So on the actual cruise, we rushed through dinner, hoping to get a "ringside" seat, close to the stage so I could at least see the body language. Wrong! Fellow cruisers were holding seats for their friends who had a late dinner, or whatever. Nothing was available for at least the first 4 rows, everything was covered with coats, purses, shoes, anything to "establish ownership". We wound up not going to the show at all.

This has happened quite a few times. On one cruise, I lucked out and wound up sitting next to a CODA! That one worked out great.

On our train trip across Canada, from Vancouver, BC to Nova Scotia, (two weeks long) the problem was DINNERTIME. A conductor (?) walked through the train sing-songing "First Dinner", Second Dinner" and so on. 'Meals on a train, the time varies quite a bit. Neither my husband or I could hear the conductor. We were late for more than one dinner with the result that my husband lost his cool. This was an "ESCORTED" trip and we should have been taken care of. Eventually the trip guides caught on and the last half of the trip was pretty uneventful.

I never was and never will be a "Deaf Sheep". Signing up for a Deaf Cruise does not appeal to me at all. I know the culture darned well, and I prefer to travel with my husband and/ or my family without the stress of a few dozen deafies who might or might not get along with one another. I feel that each one of us should be able to travel THE WAY WE WANT without being discriminated against.

I have found a company called "vacations to go" who is very compassionate and has kept in touch with me for quite sometime. Anyone interested should email: alanfox@vacationstogo.com and he will put you on a special needs email list for you to consider.

Lantana

"Out There", The Cashiers, The Hotel Desk, eeek!

2007-04-07T20:41:00.000-07:00

I just returned from 5 days "out there" in the jungle of people in the larger cities, and I am so happy to be home! My grand daughter and I did her Spring Break together. 'Not my first time, and not my second or third, but I am getting "older" and I can "feel the difference".

I live in a very small town, less than 5,000 souls in the winter time and all the clerks, and business owners know me by my first name and are familiar with how to "mouthe" their words so that I do not miss anything. The post office, the gas station, the hairdresser -- everyone is my friend and I am sometimes even able to forget that I am deaf here!

Not so "out there". Why do clerks find it necessary to ask your phone number, your zip code, whether you want a box (or not), if you want paper or plastic -- and so on it goes. Luckily this trip I had my 11 year old grand daughter with me and she rescued me more than once.

HOWEVER, in a hotel, what happens when your room "keys" do not work? What if there are not enough towels? How about the toilet over flowing, the battery in the remote control for the t.v. is dead, the light bulb (that you need for reading) is burned out? 'RIGHT, the telephone is necessary, (or) you hike back to the desk in the lobby to complain.

I had reservations 2 weeks in advance with all the particulars written in the reservations, right down to the fact that I was DEAF, but for some reason all of the same questions were asked over again. (But unfortunately not in the same order).

Oh well, I want everyone to know that we had a great time, the weather was beautiful and we had a room overlooking The Mighty Columbia River. All's Well That Ends Well. (I guess).

Your Pal In Crime, Lantana

Student Life Counselors (R.A.)

2007-03-27T16:52:00.000-07:00

I am very happy that someone brought up the subject of Student Life Counselors (R.A.s) in residential schools. 'Recognizing these often overworked and usually unappreciated people is long overdue.

What many people do not know or realize is that the education of a SLC never ends. These people take classes during vacations, summers and anytime that it might be convenient for all to get together with an instructor. As a former and retired SLC I have lost track of all the classes I took, but I do recall that there were many of them. 'Two being Self Defense and Human Sexuality. These classes go on your record and often count towards a raise in pay.

There has been alot of dead wood working in the dorms over the years and this possibly created the idea that all SLC's are losers and/or undereducated housewives. There were more than a few of the later and one year we had an influx of left-overs from the State School For The Blind, who would have been otherwise laid off. These people knew nothing about the deaf, nor could they sign. The results being that the signing staff was overused and overwelmed while the non-signing staff drew the same salary for doing next to nothing. One woman I worked with sat at her desk and swore at the kids for 8 hours a day.

Over the years the job requirements became more strict and no one was hired unless they passed a video test proving that they could sign. (Keep in mind the dead wood remained until they either quit or retired). Getting fired was never an option because of the Union.

I am not sure about other schools but our school was a closed Union Shop and we could not work unless we joined the union. This was both good and bad. I recall one young woman that was able to keep her job only because she would run crying to the Union and they would step in and go to her defense. There are always some SLC who want only to be popular and be best buds with the students. First and foremost, an SLC has to earn his/her students' respect and you cannot do that by acting the same age as the students.

A book written by dorm staff is long overdue. The frequent suggestion that the SLC sit on their hind ends for 8 hours a day is ridiculous. These people have the students for 8 hours each day, often longer if there is an away game or a field trip somewhere. There are parties, basketball and football games to attend to, not to mention the Proms, the Homecoming Dances, and so on and so forth. All of us had to take turns doing bus duty on weekends and this usually involved a great deal of overtime. There were situations when there was not enough SLC on hand so some of us would volunteer to work a double shift, both for the extra money and to make sure the students were being cared for properly.

I have ALWAYS said that the greatest attribute an SLC could have is COMMON SENSE. Without common sense one would never make the grade. I have seen many teachers with Masters Degrees without a shred of common sense. Some things you can learn only through experience. 'Higher education is a wonderful, useful tool but to put it to good use you need the ability to REASON. Not everyone can lay claim to this attribute.

Eventually I will have more on the subject of Student Life Counselors.

Through Deaf Eyes

2007-03-22T11:49:00.000-07:00

Last night, I had the pleasure of watching Through Deaf Eyes on the PBS Network. I was very pleased with what was offerred on the program, even learned a few things myself.

Because of my age and having been through hard knocks back when the deaf, (as human beings), were unacknowledged, I am extremely appreciative of any and all positive tidbits thrown our way.

And from my viewpoint, the controversy over the "deaf" sign can be retired forever. I saw only ONE instance of "ear closed". Or did I miss something?

Lantana

Gardening For The Soul

2007-03-20T17:07:00.000-07:00

Ahh, I just spent a weekend planting broccoli. When I am gardening, I have plenty of time to THINK. It used to be that I thought of my dad at these times because he was the one who taught me to garden, but Dad is gone now and his farming abilities are being carried on via his daughter. (Thanks, Dad!)

So, this time I was wondering how many deaf people have the good fortune to have a garden, whether it be veggies or flowers or both. When you are out there, be it rain or shine, you forget everything else and concentrate on getting a straight row and the seed at the proper depth and wondering if you have the right mixture of fertilizers, lime, slug bait, etc. Then you cannot keep yourself from running back and forth after the first week or so to see if anything has come up. You think, "groan" when considering all that bending over. I assure you, you will not think twice about crouching, bending reaching, etc. for HOURS because you are doing something relaxing and worth while. Gardening is excellent THERAPY for whatever ails you.

Gardening is something a deaf person can do without thinking twice. 'Even before spring comes, you are pouring over seed catalogues and becoming real excited over all of the new seed offerings. You can purchase pellet seeds now, that is for the tiny seeds, like carrots and lettuce and makes planting them alot easier because you can SEE the white pellets against the dark soil. No guessing with seed pellets!

Apartment dwellers can make use of raised beds, you can get alot of veggies in one or two raised beds! Add a few Marigolds to scare off the bugs and presto you have a sight for sore eyes!

Good luck and do not forget the Epsom Salts twice a year to give your plants magnesium!

Lantana

Deaf People Who Have Non-Signing Spouses

2007-03-13T20:16:00.000-07:00

For the first time, I am wishing I was making a vlog instead of "just" a blog, so that I could imitiate the facial expressions of some of my deaf acquaintances when they find out my husband does NOT sign.

I want it to be known that there are alot of reasons that hearing spouses do not learn to sign. I am bringing up only ONE possible reason here in this post.

My own husband (we suspect) is a victim of Shaken Baby Syndrome. His mother was both mentally and physically abusive and he had a terrible time just making it through grade school, winding up only one year behind. When "cornered" with something new, or an issue that he is not familiar with, his mind goes completely blank. He cannot spell and has a check writing machine to write his checks for him. When a business letter is required, I do it. There is nothing wrong with is speaking ability or his math knowledge, but when required to "do this or else!" his mind retreats.

There are other examples I could give, many of them. When my deaf acquaintances inquire (with a sneer) WHY my husband does not sign, I reply that he has a learning disability, and he does.

My husband is a very sucessful business man, having built apartment houses and private homes for over 25 years. He carried the contracts on many of the buildings that he put together, so he is very comfortably retired, but HE CANNOT SIGN.

So, the next time you meet a deafie who's spouse does not use ASL, think twice before you re arrange your face. You could be dabbling in a subject that you know nothing about.

Children With Deaf Moms

2007-03-11T19:19:00.000-07:00

Just for fun, I quizzed my adult children what they recall about having a deaf Mom.

I have five adult children. The first four had a hearing father, but he traveled. The last one was a Koda, Mom and Dad both Deaf.

#, 1 Son: I just remember that I "got by with alot!"

#2. Daughter: "My first memory is of having to POUND on the bathtub for Mom to come and inspect our ears and tell us we could get out of the tub."

#3. Son: He says all he can remember was his mom sweeping the sidewalk, no one else's mom did that!

#4. Daughter: "I felt badly because my mom had to attend all of our music programs when she could not hear them! But she was always there!

#5. Son: I remember lying in the backseat of the car while my dad played "Crocodile Rock" FULL BLAST on the car radio.

Rude Folks

2007-03-10T17:48:00.000-08:00

Occasionally, some of the comments on blogs shown on Deafread "make my stomach hurt". I am sometimes ashamed of my fellow deafies and often wonder just where they are coming from and what makes them feel and act as they do.

I am speaking of those (you know who you are!) who make rude comments, mostly to the bloggers who are a little "different", possibly of another race, or those who are multiple handicapped. This behavior is typical of "the pecking order", which is practiced by some, including ANIMALS.

You "peckers" are not gaining anyone's respect and just might lose your priveledge of being "anonymous". WE know that you actually feel inferior and are only trying to make yourselves feel better.

I am ashamed of you.

My Interest in True Crime

2007-03-09T15:57:00.000-08:00

I was 10 years old when I lost my hearing, so naturally books became a huge part of my life. My mother read "True Detective" and some others that I cannot recall the names of. So I guess it was natural for me to pick up whatever was lying around -- and read from cover to cover.

As I became older, the detective magazines (and the pictures) started grossing me out, so I switched to True Crime novels, which I still read today. I am one of Ann Rule's biggest fans and have met her in person when she autographed one of the books that she had written. Ann Rule has an online newsletter which is fascinating.

So this murder that is going to trial with the deaf woman defendent, interests me. I feel that she has too many strikes against her, she is deaf, she is black and she is a lesbian. How can The People find a decent jury? I am going to follow this trial very closely.

When I was working in the deaf group home, "moonlighting", we had several deaf people living there who were paroled to us. One was a young, good looking and very personable black man and he had been charged with murder. I do not recall all the details but I really liked this guy, he seemed to be gentle and respectful and very loving. He claimed his innocence and due to the fact that he only used Minimum Language Skills, not pure ASL, it was impossible to give him a fair trial. Reverse interpreters had to be used at all times. When this particular group home was closed by the DVR, I lost contact with this young man and have no idea how the story turned out. I felt really bad for him, he was trapped in a world he did not understand.

I hope that this deaf woman who is coming to trial has an excellent advocate, one that will work very closely with her lawyer. Things are not always as they seem, and too often there are scapegoats.

Low Visioned Deaf Folks

2007-03-04T17:06:00.000-08:00

'Reading a recent post on Deafread by a low visioned deaf person, brought back some old memories.

Quite a few years ago, when I was single and my children all grown and out of the house, I usually had 2 or 3 jobs going at the same time. For several years I moonlighted in a group home for the deaf, some of whom had low vision, a few had mental problems, and a couple of them were on parole.

One deaf/blind young woman that really got to me was Kim. She had to be driven to the U. of Oregon Medical facility every so often for checkups because she had glaucoma and she had been going there for many years. Well on this day, I was chosen to drive her to her appointment. I was not familiar with the U. of Oregon and finding a parking place was a problem and the METERS were a bigger problem. Fumbling around in my purse for the right change took a few minutes. While my back was turned, Kim disappeared! She was gone, vamoosed! Needless to say, my heart was pounding and I felt pretty stupid. I was in an unfamiliar place and I had lost a deaf/blind girl!

I gathered my wits about me and went to the Information Desk. "Excuse me, I have lost a deaf/blind girl". (Blushing).

The receptionist laughed and laughed and told me to go ahead and go to the doctors office where the appointment was to be. She seemed to know what she was talking about and kept on chuckling at my discomfort.

Sure enough, there was Kim in her doctor's office, sitting there waiting her turn with her white cane firmly planted on the ground and with a big smile on her face! I was lost but she sure wasn't!

Lantana's Latitude: "Starbucks"

2007-02-19T19:19:00.000-08:00

Lantana's Latitude: "Starbucks"

www.deafchatcoffee.com/oregon/Astoria

"Starbucks"

2007-02-19T11:57:00.000-08:00

I am presuming that there are many deafies here who attend a monthly or bi-monthly gathering, be it at Starbucks or some other coffeehouse. I am looking for information and ideas. Any feedback will be very much appreciated.

Since we live in a resort community where deafies frequently come to vacation, I thought it would be wonderful to have our group published on DeafChatCoffee. This way, the vacationers will know where to find us at a certain time. ' Choosing the right location is not easy and of course you cannot satisfy everyone no matter how hard to try.

So far I have not been able to choose the right location, the right time of day or the day of the week. Someone always whines. One fellow was upset because there was no t.v. to watch football games on. Others said that the time (2:00 p.m.) was too late, others said it was too early. And on it goes.

Keep in mind that a night life here on the Coast can be complicated because of the weather which can change without notice. So we prefer to do our socializing in the daytime. Deafies come from all over to our gatherings, as far as 60 miles one way, so we want a nice place where we feel comfortable and accepted.

What I would like to know is how other deaf persons have solved the different issues of having a DeafChatCoffee.

Signalers

2007-02-18T14:08:00.000-08:00

Another problem I have run up against, tho not necessarily for seniors, only, is the problem of doorbell/telephone/VP signalers for the deaf.

I am of the old school and for many years used "Phone/TTY" signalers. I no longer see them advertised, tho they SERVED ME WELL for many, MANY years.

When we purchased our beach home I spent a great deal of money on Symplicity signalers, (tho I had to go with another brand for the VP). We have had nothing but trouble with these signalers, they go on and off at will for no reason, go on and stay on, occasionally do not work at all and we cannot put a receiver wherever we want. They work on some walls and not others.

We have been told by the manufacturer that we cannot use extension cords OR
surge protectors nor 3-way light bulbs. Hello?

We even had our whole house rewired, "cleaned up" to make sure we did not have any gremlins or bugs. Doing this did not help matters at all.

We are on the Oregon Coast where 100+ mph winds are the special of the day. Power surges are part of everyday life. And the police department with all of their radios, and equipment is directly in line with our house. We have "ham radio operators" on ever block.

We are at our wits end. "Buy a dog?" We already have 3 cats and a parrot.

I happen to know that I am not the only deafie that has complained, but what can we do?

Concerning Seniors

2007-02-17T12:51:00.000-08:00

There have been so many hot topics lately, some of them I feel that I would be better off staying out of. So I have decided to bring up a topic that I have not seen elsewhere.

That topic is "Pagers For Seniors". You high tech Baby Boomers out there need to invent a pager with a Qwerty keyboard with the buttons far enough apart that we Seniors can use it. Many of us (most, in fact!) have arthritis in our fingers and hands and handling a Blackberry or a Sidekick comfortably is a chore.

I have put off purchasing a pager for myself for that reason AND because T-Mobile coverage is very poor in our area. I am presently focused on the Blackberry, but which one?? All my deaf friends who have pagers are much younger than myself. THEIR advice has been well received and duly noted. I actually would like to have a Sidekick, but I long ago learned that I cannot have everything I want. Smile.

People of my generation learned to type on a manual typewriter which means that we can bang away on a computer faster than most. I can even carry on an oral conversation with my husband without stopping what I am typing. But a pager for me, at my age, has me stymied.

"Hearing People"

2007-02-02T10:16:00.000-08:00

It has been interesting reading about other deafie's "takes" on the hearing population who find themselves dealing with a deafie or deafies. I would like to comment on the subject.

We had a social worker at school, who signed pretty well, was reasonably well liked and obviously loved her job. However, I was always very uncomfortable around this woman and found myself cringing when she dropped by my office. Finally I figured out why! She ALWAYS stood in the doorway with one foot out the door like she couldn't wait to get away! She actually talked to us sideways! I finally talked to her privately and told her of my concerns. Sure enough after that, she gave us her full attention and I enjoyed her visits more!

Some demeanors that I dislike in hearing people are: Those who go around with a PERPETUAL SMILE. No facial expression, no sadness, no glee, no nothing. Just a huge blank smile! It is very difficult to read a person's lips when all you can see is teeth! ' Hearing people, while they are talking to you, their eyes dart around the room quickly, never actually landing on your face, anywhere BUT your face! I once had a hearing co worker who's eyes constantly "dropped down" and I am sure the deaf men thought that their fly was open! We deafies need strong eye contact! Oh, and there is the old "Oh, never mind!" That one really tee's me off and I have come right out and told people that it is very rude! One lady even agreed with me! Another thing (that CODAS are usually guilty of) is speaking with their chin way up so you can see the roof of their mouths! One interpreter I had was very guilty of this and I was fascinated with the color of the roof of her false teeth!

There are many, many more. Perhaps I will leave it to others to contribute their pet peeves about hearies?

Sick Pets

2007-01-24T18:53:00.000-08:00

We are all terribly concerned when our pets become ill. I think that pets hold a special place in a deafie's heart, perhaps it is the unabashed love they give us, no matter if we have strange voices or speak a "different" language!

Our Solomon Island Eclectus parrot, Lenny has been under the weather. So I drove the 160 miles round trip, over the mountains and through the snow to the only Avian vet within 200 miles. My usual avian vet has retired and now I have a woman doctor, with a slight Asian accent of some kind. We did okay and she was willing to write anything down that I did not completely understand.

Lenny (a male!) has a "yeast" infection. Hmmm. Stool cultures were taken as well as blood tests. His blood showed a high white count suggesting an infection somewhere in his body. So we have been doing a regiment of antibiotics. 'Ever give a large beaked bird oral meds? Owie! After a great deal of thought, I went to my online parrot forum and asked for advice. They told me to mix his meds with a little peanut butter on bread. Bing0! Vet: $329.00 Parrot forum: No charge.

Not only that, but the forum of parrot lovers also taught me that if I place a tiny amount of UNFILTERED apple cider vinegar in his drinking water each time I change it, that will control any future "yeast" infections.

Parrot forum score: 01 Vet score: 0

"Grassroots" meaning in deaf culture

2006-12-27T19:21:00.002-08:00

It was very interesting to me to read on someone's blog about what the term "grassroots" would mean in the deaf world.

First we would need to know for sure what it signifies in the hearing world. THEN apply it to us.

To me, grassroots would be an ASL speaking deaf person who probably went to a state run school for the deaf. ' And a deaf person who has never depended on Federal money to survive.

I actually have no schoolmates from my deaf school who EVER collected SSI or any other kind of benefit from the government. We all worked and usually stayed with the same job for 25 to 30 years. That is TRUE grassroots.

Nice!

2006-12-10T13:34:00.000-08:00

I am happy to see that Davila got the job. I mean, the temporary job. He deserves it.

I have never met Bob personally but I went to school with his wife, Donna.

For him to win this position, even tho it is temporary, is a great tribute to him. I am sure Donna is very proud.

Hospital Experiences

2006-12-01T16:06:00.000-08:00

I was just reading in a deaf blog about this one person's experience in going to a hospital. Anything medical is usually a scary experience for the deaf.

Last winter I had a knee replacement which was planned far in advance. This operation required a 4-day hospital stay. It is major surgery and it hurts like heck.

I had an interpreter for pre-op and post-op. That was it. Then when I finally wound up in a room, I discovered I had no closed captioned t.v. I let it be plain that this was NOT acceptable. On the 2nd day of recovery I found that I was getting pretty hungry, everyone got to eat except me! Puzzled I finally asked one of the staff and she replied, "You have to call the kitchen on the telephone and tell them what you want." Well, we got THAT problem straightened out and then they wheeled me to another room that DID have cc t.v. I shared the t.v. with a 14 year old girl who watched Nick At Night 24/7. 'Later the nurse handed me a telephone and told me that my husband wanted to talk to me. On the 3rd day (of four) the hospital chaplain finally showed up with a TTY. He looked so pleased with himself that I did not have the heart to tell him that he was at least 10 years behind the times!

Lantana's Latitude

Happy New Year

Better Late Than Never

OPEN Captions

Open Captions

Slowly But Surely ..............

Bad Karma

Looking For Spring!

A New Community (New to Me, Anyway!)

Moooving (ugh)

Missing Landmarks

Losing Friends

LIFE ON AN AXIS

Alas! Poor Oreck!

No Arizona!

Stormy Oregon Coast

Speechless

A New Deaf Author

A New Year, a new profile?

A Typical Day

"Music Within"

Heavy Hearts

Children and heartaches

Driving Daze

More Interesting Tidbits

Update on Lantana's "Longitude"

DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME

Lantana and Seek Geo in Seaside

AnotherExperience to Share!

Finally Some Sunshine!

2008 ~~~Sigh~~~

Latest Buzz

General Update

I Bought Myself a Butler!

Where Has The Time Gone ? ?

Oil Can Henry's

Epilogue

The Death Of A Spouse

The Death Of A Spouse

The Death Of A Spouse

The Death Of A Spouse

The Death Of A Spouse

The Death Of A Spouse

Mish Mash

Traveling With a Disability

His? Hers?

LESSONS FROM GEESE

Mental Health Hot Line

Lest We Forget

My First Full Body Massage!

Oil Change Syndrome

Sick and Tired of Cranberries??

Joyous Holiday Season

Another Gooood Recipe For Special Occasions

What Did I Expect?

Tis The Season

The Usual Hospital Quagmire

The KKK Incident And Davila's CNN Interview

Possible Over Indulgence = Vascular Disease

~~Sigh~~ Not Again!

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood --Prologue

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 9

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 8

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 7

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 6

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood Part 5

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood, Part 4

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood, Part 3

The Original Farmers Daughter, Part 2

Going Deaf In Middle Childhood

The Gestapo

A Little of Everything

Still Kicking!

"D"eaf jokes vs "d"eaf jokes, Idioms, etc

LEST WE FORGET

LOVE THY NEIGHBOR

DESPERATELY SEEKING GEO

Variety Is The Spice Of Life

All Things Wise And Wonderful

Vacations To Go

2008 ~Sigh~

Sigh Not Again!